What I Like about You
by Darla Winifred
Summary: FIXED - Spuffy Buffy is sent to jail after her roomate Faith kills someone. Spike is an Officer, they meet sparks fly and some unbelievable things start to happen, to them and the people around them
1. Default Chapter

Chapter 1 -  
  
I walked along the road of the very busy L.A. city. I was just getting off of my job from the restaurant, my blonde hair which was in a nice neat bun was now falling out of the scrunchy.  
My white button up blouse was now wrinkled from the smooth material it was hours ago. My black skirt was now scrunched up instead of the smooth sleek look it was.  
I was wore out, tonight was Friday night and usually the busiest.  
Faith my roommate was supposed to pick me up but after an hour of waiting I decided to head home on my own.  
She forgot sometimes but I didn't blame her. She had a very hectic life and she needed to recover from the abuse she had experienced from her old boyfriend. So I usually shrugged it off when she forgot things like this.  
The street was smoky and it smelled like something had died weeks ago. I ignored it and concentrate on getting home. I passed a few dirty faces which I assumed belonged to the homeless. I just tried to not make eye contact, keep my head down and to get home so I could finally sleep.  
A scream sounded from one of the alleys. My eyes widened as I realized it was Faith's.  
I quickly ran down to the alley to see what the problem was with her. I feared for her life and I was scared she was hurt.  
I ran into the dirty alley to see Faith being held against the wall by a man.  
I grabbed the pepper spray from my purse and went up to him but by the time I came up to the man Faith has trust a knife into his gut. I saw him fall to the ground wailing in pain. My eyes widened at the scene.  
"Hey Buffy." She said to me as if nothing had happened.  
"Faith. You... you...killed him." I stuttered out.  
"It was self defense he attacked me."  
I shook my head. "Faith. No. This isn't self defense you killed a man."  
"Look no one will know. I'll throw the knife in a dumpster. It'll be fine." She came up to me, put her hand on my shoulder. "I'll take care of it." She assured me.  
I think she knew that I would freak. She was like my exact opposite. She was what I could be if I had taken different roads in my life, and that honestly scared me to my very core.  
I backed out of the alley my eyes never leaving the man on the ground. Faith and I got into her car and she drove us to our apartment. I knew she couldn't get away with it, and it still scared me.  
  
From that night on, the murder Faith had committed changed my life. Forever. or the better or the worse?  
You make the call.  
  
Here is my story....  
  
Authors note- Review. Please. I basically know where I'm going with this. I know very short chaprter but i wanted a introduction. And this was it.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2  
  
Here is my story...  
  
Faith had killed man.  
Cold blooded murder. I think I was still in the land of denial. I just wanted to wake up from this horrid nightmare and I would be safe in bed with no murderess in my house. Of course it never happens like that does it?  
  
Faith had helped my stunned self into the apartment. She knew I wasn't taking this well.  
I loved Faith, I really do. Ever since we were in high school we were best friends. I had had a boyfriend and he was hurting me and Faith "rescued" me. She was my protector and I was the responsible one. We never felt like we could survive without each other.  
A year ago, I again was in another abusive relationship. Nothing bad just he would slap me once in a while. (I always seemed to go for the bad boys.)  
Once he had made a huge mistake he had hit me in front of Faith. Faith had ended up wailing on him until he was unconscious and in a coma.  
She's still on probation for that.  
  
Faith helped me into my room. She knew that I couldn't handle this so she did all she could do to help.  
She sat me down on my bed. I wasn't moving at all as the images ran through my mind.  
She reached over and too k the bun out of my hair. Then helped me undress and helped me into bed.  
She did this. She murdered someone. I couldn't believe that.  
She was now pulling the comforter over me and turned off the light leaving.  
I drifted off to sleep as the nightmares filled my head.  
  
I woke with a jolt the ending of a nightmare had woke me.  
I was sitting up straight in my bed but I was so exhausted I fell back onto the soft material and just stared at the ceiling.  
Not so shocked anymore I could fully think about what was happening.  
I hope Faith was right when she said she'd take care of everything. Murders happened all the time in L.A. How was this any different? Then I realized something was different. It was happened to us.  
You always hear about these things but you never realize that it can happen to you till it does.  
Just then Faith came rushing into my room.  
"It's on TV"  
My eyes widened as I rushed into the living room. The TV was on the local news station  
_  
"Cops found the body of John Jamison in the alley behind a bar in L.A. Cops believes they have found the killer due to anonymous witness. No further information will be released at this time."  
_  
The TV had just told me they have found out who killed the guy. I started to panic there was a knock at the door.  
I felt like I could of fell over that ever second. I walked over to the door then opened it.  
"Hello?" I asked the woman at the door behind her stood two men.  
"Hello are you Buffy Anne Summers?"  
I felt like I was about to be killed. "Yes." I stuttered out.  
"Miss. Summers I have a warrant for your arrest. Please come with me."  
"What!" I asked, they thought it was me. They thought I killed this man I didn't have the heart to tell them it was Faith.  
"What!" I heard Faith from the background.  
"Witnesses have placed you at the crime scene last night. Please come with me."  
"No!" Faith yelled. "You can't she didn...." I interrupted her.  
"Faith calm down." She came up to me and whispered.  
"You didn't do it."  
I whispered back to her just out of the range of the police. "Faith let me take this you could get in a lot more trouble for this instead of me. They don't have evidence that I did it. Just a witness. Just someone's word. You actually have evidence against you. Physcical evidence. Plus you're still on probation"  
Faith hung her head down knowing she couldn't fight with me and nodded.  
"I love you B." She told me. I looked up to face her.  
"Love ya too." I said giving her a hug. I finally released and the female officer took my hands and cuffed them. I could see the pain in Faiths eyes as she did that. I wasn't sure if Faith would break down crying or attack the officer. Fortunately I was pulled out of there before we had a chance to find out.  
My hands hurt so much the officer, that the others called Lilah had held of my hands really tightly and it stung.  
  
Lilah shoved me into the car back seat. I felt like I was trash. It was weird how people could make you feel like that.  
  
Authors note - Review.


	3. chapter 3 Officer Giles

Chapter 3  
  
They pulled the car up to the police station, I just sat there wallowing in my own pity.  
I hung my head down staring at my feet. Lilah got out of the car, opened my door and pulled me out. She was forceful but if I thought someone was a murderer I wouldn't be that gentle.  
She practically dragged me into the police station. I couldn't let Faith get arrested she would be in a hell of a lot more trouble than I am.  
As Lilah pulled me through the door of the station she yelled out.  
"John she's here." Lilah yelled. God I felt like crap. I felt like I was on display for a crime I didn't even commit. She sat me down on a chair uncuffed one of my hands and locked it onto the chair. She thought I would leave. Like I would be that stupid, but she didn't now that she thought I killed someone so it probably wouldn't take much for me to leave a police station.  
The dark haired man came out and smiled. "Look what we have here. A little murderer."  
I felt tears starting to build. I tried to ignore him but I just couldn't, I wasn't exactly one for being emotionally strong. That was more Faiths thing.  
A tear ran down my face. The man started to laugh at me. "Oh look everyone she's crying." He taunted me.  
Out of nowhere a police man with white blonde hair spoke up from behind his desk. "Leave the girl alone."  
"The man turned to him. "Spike, you have to understand their criminals. No matter how cute they are. Besides Spike your transferring to the state Women's correctional facility. Why care?"  
Spike laughed I looked up to see him smile to me.  
"John just because they made mistakes doesn't mean you can bug them."  
John laughed then turned to me. "She killed a man. I wouldn't be so lenient to her if I was you."  
I saw Spike raise his head to that, eyes widened. But quickly looked away when Lilah came up to me with a tape recorded.  
"OK, All you have to do is tell me what happened speak into this. If you just admit to this we wouldn't have to have a trial. Just a judge sentencing you." She had seemed to lighten up more to me. I nodded.  
She pushed the "Record" button on the tape recorder than spoke into it.  
"May 2, 2004. The testimony of Elizabeth Anne Summers." Then she turned it my way and I spoke.  
"I Buffy Anne Summers, on May 1, 2004 killed John Jamison by stabbing him in the gut with a knife in an alley. Then I left him there when the cops found him."  
Lilah shut it off before I could continue. "That's all we need. We're sending you to the states Woman Correctional Facility. Then we will appoint a judge to sentence you. Thank you for your cooperation."  
She told me then continued. "We will send you with a police officer to pick up things from your apartment. Then we will send you off ." She told me then left. She walked over to John.  
"hey could you go with her to pick things up from her apartment?"  
"Sorry Lilah I have to much paper work to do and I have to send the tape. Ask Spike." I saw Lilah roll her eyes. "Fine." She walked over to The white haired man.  
"Officer Giles. Could you please go with Miss. Summers to pick things up from her apartment?"  
I saw I'm look over to me before he answered. "Sure, I just finished the last of my paper work for today. I'll take her."  
"Thank you." Lilah told him then handing him a file with my address.  
Officer Giles walked over to knelt down and took the handcuff off the chair then gently took the one off my left hand.  
"No need for these?" He asked me. I shook my head.  
He smiled "Good."  
I thought he was absolutely gorgeous.  
He led me out of the station and to one of the police cars.  
  
We arrived at my apartment a few minutes later. We walked up the stair till we arrived at my door. I knocked hoping Faith was home.  
After a few minutes of shuffling I heard her some to the door. Her mascara was smeared she must have been crying. When she saw me we quickly hugged me. Tightly.  
"Faith, sweetie oxygen is becoming an issue."  
"What happened?" She asked me worried.  
I closed my eyes then told her. "I admitted to the murder. "I saw sadness fall over her features at that. "I'm going to the Women's Correctional Facility soon. I came to get things."  
I knew she must be caring the burden for me covering for her.  
"Look. I love you so much. I will find a way to get you out." Officer Giles turned to her. She saw that hen said. "Legally."  
"I swear I will visit everyday and write if I can't visit. You'll be the most popular inmate there." I smiled at that. "Oh and don't let anyone push you around. If so I will find someway to kick their ass."  
"You're always there for me. Like I'm there for you." I said hugging her.  
  
She had helped me pack a few things like clothes and shampoo and everything like that. Officer Giles basically kept to himself while me and her got my things.  
Before I left she hugged me, we shared little words and I left. I knew this probably was going to be more of a punishment to her than to me. This was big for her. She knew she didn't lead the best life but what she did finally affected me. I knew her seeing me pay for her mistakes was killing her. She always wanted to keep me safe but now_ I _was keeping _her_ safe.


	4. chapter 4 Roomates

Chapter 4 - Roommates  
  
I walked down the hall of the Women's Correctional Facility.  
They were bringing me to the room where I would be staying I was scared, nervous and most of all overwhelmed that all this could happen so fast.  
The heavy set woman led me to my room. They said I would staying with three different people, nervous that I would be living with three actual criminals frightened me.  
We arrived to the door. The lady walking with me opened it to reveal A large room with Four beds, three looked slept in when the other was perfectly set up.  
A small closet on the side, with the doors open revealed various clothes, most of was the uniform we had to wear.  
She started to speak to me. "Ok, here is where you'll sleep." She said pointing to the unslept in bed.  
"The bathrooms are down the hall. You are not allowed to have razors here. If you need to shave you will have a staff member supervise. Your room mates should fill you in on other things. Like when the lights are out and other things like that. They should be here soon. Fell free to unpack your things while you wait."  
As she said that to me she left me alone in the empty room. You know how when people say "They made me feel like a convicted felon."? Well this time I knew exactly what they were talking about.  
I sat down on my bed hands on my knees. I grabbed the bag were my things were and took some of the things out.  
Then is when my roommates walked in. Two blondes and a dark skinned brunette.  
They turned to me. A stranger.  
"They said we would have a newbie." One of the blondes said.  
"Leave her alone. Remember when we first arrived we were scared out of our damn minds." The other blonde told her. She knelt down to me. "Hi, I'm Darla" She pointed to the blonde that called me a "newbie". "That's Glory. Here's a little tip. Mind her shoes she had a thing for her stupid heels." She then pointed to the dark haired woman. "That is Kendra."  
A little nervous but I was able to say. "Hi, I'm Buffy."  
"Hello Buffy." Kendra said to me she had a very thick accent.  
The three went and sat on their bed.  
"So what are you in for?" Glory asked.  
"I accidentally killed someone." I told them a little nervously.  
"Really?" Darla asked. "I killed my Ex.'s new girlfriend then killed him for getting me pregnant then leaving me."  
Kendra spoke up. "I attacked someone while they were sleeping. I thought they were someone else."  
Glory then turned her head to me. "I tied up a 16 year old then cut her making her bleed on top of some tower. Oh and stabbed some guy in the chest. Then they accused me of making some girl crazy which I think is absolute bullshit. "Glory looked under her bed then pulled out a Cosmo magazine.  
I smiled these three girls seemed down to earth and normal. Not psychotic like I though but sweet.  
Darla got up and walked over to my bed sitting down. "Would you like me to help you unpack and fill you in on a few things?" I basically nodded. This place wasn't as bad as I had imagined.  
"Great." she said jumping off the bed and grabbing my things. She walked over to the closet and I absently followed her.  
The closet was tiny but you could tell which clothes belonged to who. "Here." She said pointing to the first section. "are Glory's clothes." Her clothes were basically bright red and beneath them were stacks of shoes which I doubt she ever wore. "Here she said pointing to the second section. "Is Kendra's, She only had one shirt and she refused to borrow any one else's." She pointed to the third section. "These are mine." Her clothes were mostly dark red and black. "You can borrow anything from me if you like. Glory is very protective of here clothes. Sometimes she acts like a goddess." I smiled at that. Glory over heard and yelled out. "Hey." Darla turned to her. "Well you do." Glory raised her eyebrows agreeing and she turned back to her magazine.  
"Well." She started to talk as she hung up my things. "Lights are out at ten and we wake up at seven for breakfast then we usually go out for community work. How many years did you get?" She asked me. The judge announced my sentencing a few days ago. "5 years. He decided that it was self defense and shortened my sentence."  
"That rocks." She said smiling. "Oh at seven we eat dinner. Which is about in half an hour. Did one of the staff tell you the razor rule?"  
I looked at her and nodded. "Yeah, I tried it a few years back and I got in a lot of trouble." She said rolling her eyes. "I have about 5 years left too.  
  
During dinner which was held in a huge cafeteria I saw officer Giles walking around, it looked like someone was giving him a tour. Now is when I remembered that they said he would be transferring here.  
It would be nice to have at least one familiar face even when he wasn't that familiar. He walked by and turned to me then smiled. I smiled back.  
  
That day was the day I truly felt something for him. I guess Faith hadn't completely ruined my life.  
  
Authors note- REVIEW!!! please :) I really want to know what you guys think.


	5. chapter 5 Spike

chapter 5 - Spike  
  
Its been a week since I first entered this place and Faith had done exactly what she promised and visited me everyday. Kendra ended up killing herself a few days ago. No one was taking it well. She had found a Knife and slit her wrists during the night. We all woke up to Glory screaming.  
  
Darla and Glory were taking it really bad. I missed her so much. She was the little tang in our pathetic life.  
I have gotten used to this by now, Faith everyday, My roommates and their issues plus this girl Cordelia who wouldn't get off my case. Apparently she slept with her boyfriend's son who got her pregnant then she went on a killing rampage. This girl is seriously about to snap and I honestly didn't want to be around when it happened.  
Well that was inevitable considering I see her practically everyday. She was a serious nutcase I'm surprised that she couldn't plead insanity.  
  
I was sitting on my bed when a knock came to the door. The door opened.  
"Buffy Summers?"  
"Yes." I said. The lady told me that Faith was waiting for me.  
  
I walked down the hall to see Faith waiting in a room for me. The room was guarded with one guard.  
I walked in and smiled. Faith gave me a hug. When she was hugging me she whispered in my ear.  
"Just let me take the fall." She said pulling away. I shook my head. "No, I don't want anything bad to happened to you."  
She smiled at that. "I brought you a few things." She told me. "I left them at the front desk. Just some body wash and other things."  
"Thank you." I said smiling. I loved it when she was here. She was practically my big sister.  
"No problem."  
  
After talking to Faith for a while I was escorted outside.  
Their stood Glory, Darla and Cordelia. Just my luck. We were supposed to be cleaning around the building. I grabbed one of those pointy stick things. I always forgot what they were called. I grabbed a trash bag and started to pick up various trash.  
Cordelia came up to me and start to mess with me.  
"Hey, Buffy. How's Kendra?"  
My blood started to boil but I ignored the crazy brunette. "Cordelia. Fuck off." I mumbled in her direction.  
"Oh I forgot." Cordelia said actually acting, like she cared. "She's dead. Isn't she?" She said tilting her as if she didn't know.  
I couldn't contain the anger that was building up inside of me. I felt like I was about to blow up.  
Darla looked over and saw this. She quickly came and stood between up. "OK. Calm down kiddies."  
She said holding us back.  
"How about you." She said pointing to Cordelia. "Go over there and Buffy you go over there." She said pointing to the other side.  
"No, don't think so." Cordelia said walking towards Darla.  
"You do not tell me what I can and cannot do." Darla turned to her.  
"Ok. Cordelia, dumbass. Think about it smart one. I just stopped her from beating you into a bloody pulp. Now if you continue you will have me to answer to also."  
With that I saw Cordelia back off.  
  
Today was as sucky the last few. Me, Darla and Glory sat in the cafeteria eating dinner. This plate of goo was anything but what I would call a dinner but I have gotten used to it. Beside Faith brought me some cookies and I guess I could just munch on those after before I go to sleep.  
I was pulled out of my thoughts by Glory.  
"You know that new guy. Officer Giles. He's really cute. Isn't he Darla?"  
Darla nodded. "Very. But he's not my type I'm more of a dark haired girl my self." Glory nodded understandingly.  
"What about you Buffy?" Glory asked. "He's very yummy." I said smiling. We all nodded in agreement about officer Giles.  
He was really cute. I mean extremely. He was all I thought about when I was alone but I never told anyone.  
I saw him everyday just walking down the halls and he always smiled and I smiled back .Everyday it was the same and I wasn't tired of it.  
He seemed like the only stable one in this entire place including the staff.  
  
I walked down to bed while Glory and Darla sat in the game room watching TV. I was honestly to tired to stay up any longer. Today had been a long day and I needed some rest.  
I walked down the hall as I passed Officer Giles. I smiled. Smiling was the only gestures we have passed toward each other.  
"Hello, Buffy." Until now. The was he said my name made me shiver.  
"Hello. officer Giles" I said smoothly hiding my fascination for him.  
"Call me Spike." He said. His voice was silky.  
"Thank you." was all that came out of mouth.  
Spike left down the hall grinning.  
He told me to call him Spike! He did didn't he?  
  
That was the day Spike went from formal with me to friendly. Now that was only a tiny piece of how our relationship will grow  
  
Authors note- Review. Please.


	6. CHapter 6 First time

Chapter 6 -  
  
OK, now I was nervous. I mean seriously nervous. This was the first time I ever had to do this here. I tried holding it off, but now I couldn't take it anymore. I had to shave. Hairy legs were just so uncomfortable to deal with.  
I walked down the hall and over to one of the staff members, a nice heavy set woman.  
"Hello Miss. Summers." She said smiling to me. It was kind of weird a lot of people here didn't treat you like criminals but like normal people. I think that's what makes us stay sane and not talking to elves or pixies or whatever else we would end up talking to. You never know with the crazy.  
"Hi. Mrs. Jacobs. I wanted to know what would it take for me to be able to shave?" I always tried to stay as polite as possible. That's just who I was and I figured it made everyone a little less grumpy.  
"Well. Miss Summers. Go down to the showers and there is a tub in there. Go ahead and fill it up and I will send someone to supervise you."She smiled sweetly  
"Thank you." I said with a grin. This was going to be weird someone watching me. I wanted to cringe but I made my way into the room and striped down to nothing. I turned on the tub facet and waited for it to fill up.  
After a few minutes the tub was completely full, I climbed in and waited.  
It took a few minutes but then their was a knock at the door. You really have to enjoy their respect for privacy around here. Even if I was completely naked.  
"Come in." I said as I watched for someone to appear. Here's the thing. I was not expecting this, anything but this.  
There stood Spike. My eyes widened as I tried to cover myself with my hands. Too bad we don't have about five more hands.  
He walked over handed me my razor and adverted his eyes. He walked over to a chair and sat down.  
I took some soap and lathered up my legs. I carefully ran the razor up my legs. I saw him look over once in a while. I looked over to see if he was watching.  
Accidentally we looked over at the same time. Our eyes connected and I felt a chill run up my spine. This wouldn't have been so embarrassing if I wasn't naked. Can you say Awkward moment?  
He pulled his eyes away and I continued the task I had started. When I was finished I unplugged the tub and the water drained out.  
My towel was on the other side of the room. How inconvenient. This is the first time since he came though that door I spoke.  
"Could you. Uh get my towel?" I asked pointing to the white material hanging by the door.  
"Sure." He said uncomfortably looking at the floor.  
He walked over grabbed the towel and headed my way. I stood up and went to reach for the towel until he stopped me. He indicated for me to lift my arms. I obeyed.  
Once my arms were lifted, he wrapped the towel around me. I turned to look at him. My eyes connected with his. I saw fear, longing and hunger out of those blue eyes. Before I knew what happened he leant down and kissed me. First I was taken aback then I quickly adapted by wrapping my hands around his neck. The kiss deepened. Our tongues battle for dominance. I honestly had no idea what was running through his mind as we kissed . The entire world around us melted away. There was no one, just us. No right and wrong just us. This was heaven. Absolute heaven. No one had ever kissed me this way, not with this much passion , hunger and _love_?  
I could have cared less at that moment. I was too wrapped up in the man that was standing in front of me.  
Life was Perfect.  
After a few minutes he pulled away. He was trying to catch his breath. "I'm sorry." Was all he could say to me at that moment.  
"Don't." I said as I captured his lips one last time. He kissed me one more time before leaving.  
I was left there stunned and very very confused. I touched my lips with my finger tips. I could still feel his lips still on mine. He tasted so... so..., what's the word? Yummy. That was the perfect word to describe him. All of him. Every body part.  
Spike lips, lips of Spike. I have now decided those are the best of all.  
I left for my room.  
  
You see that day was the day we first kissed. But what neither of us knew was that someone saw us. Someone walked in during our make out fest and just my luck it was Cordelia.  
  
Authors note- Please People review!!! :)


	7. Chapter 7 Innocent

Chapter 7 - Innocent  
  
It's been a few days since Spike kissed me. Whenever I passed him in the hall he would smile and I would grin back. I think he really felt something when we kissed but we haven't talked about it.  
I'm glad because I didn't want to go through that awkward moment.  
I was on my way outside with Darla and Glory to clean up around the building. Most people had to clean up the streets but all my roommates, a few others plus me had to clean the building and the area around it.  
I hadn't told anyone about Spike's and my little encounter and I honestly didn't want to. I didn't want rumors going around. I felt like I was in high school and when you told one person a secret the entire school knew in 3.5 seconds.  
  
When we got outside Cordelia of course was there. I swear something must have crawled up her ass and died. Well, I tried to ignore her as I picked up various pieces of garbage. Everyday she tormented me about something. The Kendra thing stopped because Glory and Darla would get more pissed then I would and I guess Cordy didn't want to deal with them. I don't blame her, I was grateful they were on my side. I wouldn't be able to stand against them. I knew Cordelia would start messing with me soon and I really wasn't looking forward to it.  
Well, it started when I had least expected it.  
She started singing.  
  
" Buffy and Giles sitting in a tree k-i-s-s-i-n-g."  
After that line she turned to me and smiled.  
"So, Buff. You always stand up for the ones you love. Right. Kendra. Glory. Darla and your friend Faith. I here you two are like sisters. You would die for all of them wouldn't you? But wait. Shouldn't that include one more?" She turned to a confused Darla and Glory then she turned back to me and whispered in my ear.  
"Don't worry. I can keep a secret. Guard Whore!"  
With that I lunged at the brunette. Rage running through my body. I was now on top of her on the ground. How the hell could she know that? It takes a lot of work to keep a secret in this place.  
I was scratching at her, pulling her hair and punching her. Darla and Glory ran up to me and Darla grabbed me around the waist pulling me away. Glory grabbed Cordelia. "Bitch!" I screamed at her with so much anger.  
I was trying to get out of Darla's arms and I was reaching for Cordelia so I could strangle her. I screamed in rage at the brunette. I knew she didn't do much. But these few weeks of taunting she had put me through and I had ignored, had been building and it was now coming out.  
I felt blood dripping from my lip. I guess she had gotten a lucky shot in but I didn't look half as bad as she did.  
The anger wasn't decreasing and I felt like if I could just get my hands on her she would be dead.  
"What the hell is going on here." I heard Spike's voice but I refused to stop trying to get my hands on Cordelia.  
Before I knew it Spike had flung me over his shoulder walking away. I was still kicking and reaching for the bitch. All I saw when I was being carried away was a shocked Glory and Darla, and I really pissed off Cordelia.  
  
"Dammit Buffy. What happened." Spike asked as he sat me down in his room. He saw the anger in my eyes.  
"She saw us. She called me a whore." I said without any emotion in my voice.  
Spike had wet a cloth and brought it to my lip, I flinched when it stung. He wipe away all the blood and look at me in the eyes.  
"I still can't believe you killed someone. You don't seem the type." Pain raced through me at that. I wanted to tell him the truth yet I didn't want to. But at that moment I didn't care.  
"I didn't kill anyone." Spike looked at me confused. "What?"  
"I didn't kill anyone. My friend did and I'm covering for her."  
"Buffy, you have to tell someone."  
"No." I said sternly.  
He didn't press the subject anymore instead he cupped my face in his hands and kissed me lightly at first then we became to caught up and our kisses became more passionate.  
His lips were so warm and tender against mine and god I loved it. He picked me up and carried me to his bed. I was scared at first. It's been awhile since I was with someone but that wasn't what scared me but that this was considered wrong. Right kind of wrong.  
He laid me down and I felt the mattress beneath me. He attacked by lips again as his hand trailed down my stomach and slipped beneath my pants.  
His hands were so wonderful. I haven't been touched like that for years and chill raced up my spine.  
His lips didn't leave mine as his fingers slipped under my panties and the curls that were there.  
He took two of his talented fingers and pushed inside of me. I gasped at that. Spike looked up and smiled then leant down to kiss me again. He was fucking me with his fingers and this thumb worked my clit. God this felt so good. I was diffidently going to hell but I didn't care.  
The pleasure was building up inside of me. If he just went a little faster and deeper I would bust. As if he read my mind he did exactly that.  
My climax was coming and a scream escaped my lips but Spike covered his mouth with his to muffle it. I screamed in his mouth as I came. I was trying to recapture my breathe. As he kissed my neck, my forehead then on my lips again. He looked up at me. Cordelia sure would have gotten a show this time.  
"Buffy." He whispered.  
  
After that I had left for my room.  
  
That day. Was one of the days I remembered most in my life. That was the day Spike and I had a sexual experience. It really wasn't considered sex, but it was perfect for me in the mess I was in. He seemed to make all my problems melt away.  
  
_  
Now I will tell you what I've done for you  
50,000 tears I've cried  
Screaming, deceiving, and bleeding for you  
And you still won't hear me  
Going Under  
  
Don't want your hand this time, I'll save myself  
Maybe I'll wake up for once, wake up for once  
Not tormented daily, defeated by you  
Just when I thought I'd reach the bottom  
  
I'm dying again  
I'm going under  
Drowning in you  
I'm falling forever  
I've got to break through, I'm  
Going under  
  
Blurring and stirring the truth and the lies  
So I don't know what's real and what's not  
Always confusing the thoughts in my head  
So I can't trust myself anymore  
  
I'm dying again  
I'm going under  
Drowning in you  
I'm falling forever  
I've got to break through, I'm  
  
So go on and scream  
Scream at me, I'm so far away  
I won't be broken again  
I've got to breathe  
I can't keep going under  
  
I'm dying again  
I'm going under  
Drowning in you  
I'm falling forever  
I've got to break through, I'm  
Going under  
Going under  
I'm going under  
_  
Authors note- Review Please. Song - Going under by evanesence


	8. chapter 8 Save me

Chapter 8 - Save me  
  
Two days. Two days since we had that little encounter in his room. I was completely infatuated with him. I think I was in love. I felt like I was on top of the world.  
Nothing could bring me down, a power surge was running though me veins and I was loving it.  
I haven't seen Spike much, just a couple of glances in the hall or cafeteria. He wasn't going out of his way to see me and that was crushing me. The only thing I realized the could bring me down was... him. It scared me that he had that much control on me, emotionally and physically.  
Today I was determined to find out why. Why he was ignoring me and why he hadn't spoken to me.  
  
I walked down the end of the hall and knocked on his door.  
No answer. I knocked again. Where the hell could he be?  
I went to knock once more when the door flew open, a sleepy looking Spike answered the door.  
"Buffy, what are you doing here?" He asked me as he slipped on his black shirt. I had forgotten it was five in the morning.  
"Sorry I woke you." I mumbled out. He reached out and touched my shoulder. "Is something wrong?" He asked sympathetically.  
"No nothings wrong. I just wanted to talk." I looked down at the ground kind of nervous.  
"About what?" He asked as if he was clueless.  
I looked at him like he had grown two heads. "What do you think?"  
He tensed then invited me in. I walked in nervously and sat in a chair that was next to his bed.  
"Buffy." He paused he looked like he was looking for words. This scared me. Was he trying to break up with me? Hold up. We weren't dating but was he trying to let me down easy?  
"Buffy. We can't be together." Those words felt like a stab in the gut.  
"Why?" I asked tears threatening to come out.  
"Because its not right." He stated simply.  
That pissed me off I stood up and yelled. "What about the kiss. Was that right? or the... thing we did on your bed. Was that right? Why does it matter now?"  
"Buffy calm down." He said walking over to me.  
"No! You gave me a taste and now you're just... Is this some game to you is this..." He interrupted my babbling.  
"It isn't like that Buffy and you know that."  
"Is it?" I asked. He was just fucking with my head. mind games. Goddamn fucking mind games. Well I guess they worked.  
"I can't take this." I said tears flowing freely now. I wanted an answer and I sure as hell got one.  
I stormed out of the room. Spike followed me, I have no idea why. He wanted nothing to do with me and I was giving him a free pass.  
"Buffy wait. Don't" He touched my arm, I flinched away. I spun around.  
"What?"  
"I... love you."  
What the hell!! He just told me he loved me. Oh shit. Hurry find something to say.  
"If you love me then why don't you want me."  
He walked up and kissed me.  
"I do want you. Can't you see the effect you have on me? But this won't work Buffy."  
I didn't understand.  
"Why? We can be careful."  
"Were we careful when Cordelia walked in on us kissing? In this place their is no safe rooms. Not even my room. You know that."  
I felt like Spike was food and I had been starved for years. It was right in front of me yet someone was holding me away.  
"Spike. How is this going to work? See but don't touch?"  
Spike had realized we were in the hall were anyone could overhear our conversation.  
"Buffy lets get inside to talk further."  
"No. I'm done talking." And with that I walked off.  
  
Life sucked.  
An entire day passed since our conversation. I walked down the hall to maybe try to get a few things clear. Spike couldn't deny me that.  
As I walked I was suddenly stopped by Angel. One of the other guards. I couldn't understand why his name was Angel he was anything but. He was very abusive to some of the other girls.  
"Where are you going Miss. Summers?"  
"Just walking." I lied.  
"You know you could get in a lot of trouble for that."  
"What are they going to do? Ground me?" I snapped back. He was inching closer and it scared me. I stepped back a few steps. My back met a wall.  
He was in front of me so quickly. He ran his hand in front of my shirt rubbing my breasts over the material.  
"Stop." I told him sternly.  
He ignored me. "You know we could keep this night wandering to ourselves if you do me a little favor." He said suggestively. He took my hand and pulled it to his crouch. I pulled it back.  
"Come on Buffy. Have some fun." He was starting to scare me.  
"Stop." I said again. his time he reached up and unbuttoned my shirt.  
I went to slap him but the grabbed my hand. "No none of that."  
He grabbed both of my skinny wrists with one of his hands. He was hurting me so much. The pressure on my wrists were starting to become unbearable. He continued to molest me with his other hand.  
"Stop." I half screamed one more time. He ignored. This wasn't working. I started to whimper and cry as he continued. He was so rough and uncaring. He had my top off and my pants unbuttoned. My whimpers were becoming more audible.  
"Shut up." His voice was hoarse.  
I closed my eyes.  
"What the hell is going on here." A sigh of relief washed through my body.  
Spike.  
I kept my eyes closed. I don't know why but I guess if I closed my eyes I wouldn't have to admit this was real. But I heard.  
"Hey, Spike. Nothing is going on here. "Angel tried to convince Spike but it obviously hadn't worked.  
I heard a fist slam into flesh. Hopefully it was Angel's face.  
I slowly opened my eyes to see Angel unconscious. I looked up to see Spike.  
"Are you ok?" He asked. No speaking I just shook my head.  
He walked over and picked me up. He carried me to his room and laid me on his bed.  
"Did he hurt you?"  
I shook my head again.  
"Can I look?"  
"Yes." It came out a whisper.  
He looked me up and down examining me. I assume he found no harm.  
"Lay down." He told me calm. I obeyed and did what he asked. He climbed on the bed and laid next me to me where I was spooned against him. I realized he just wanted to hold me, making sure I wasn't broken." What if someone comes in?" I asked  
"I don't' care." I smiled at that and shifted to get comfortable.  
"I love you." I told him.  
Then we both drifted off to sleep.  
  
That was the day, he had saved me and the first time "I love you" had escaped out mouths. I know we didn't know each other that well, but we both felt like we had found our missing half.  
_  
Uh huh, life's like this  
Uh huh, uh huh, that's the way it is  
Cause life's like this  
Uh huh, uh huh that's the way it is  
  
Chill out whatcha yelling' for?  
Lay back it's all been done before  
And if you could only let it be  
you will see  
I like you the way you are  
When we're drivin' in your car  
and you're talking to me one on one but you've become  
  
Somebody else round everyone else  
You're watching your back like you can't relax  
You're tryin' to be cool you look like a fool to me  
Tell me  
  
Why you have to go and make things so complicated?  
I see the way you're acting like you're somebody else gets me frustrated  
Life's like this you  
And you fall and you crawl and you break  
and you take what you get and you turn it into honesty  
and promise me I'm never gonna find you fake it  
no no no  
  
You come over unannounced  
dressed up like you're somethin' else  
where you are and where it's at you see  
you're making me  
laugh out when you strike your pose  
take off all your preppy clothes  
you know you're not fooling anyone  
when you've become  
  
Somebody else round everyone else  
Watching your back, like you can't relax   
Trying to be cool you look like a fool to me  
Tell me  
  
Why you have to go and make things so complicated?  
I see the way you're acting like you're somebody else gets me frustrated  
Life's like this you  
and You fall and you crawl and you break  
and you take what you get and you turn it into  
honesty  
promise me I'm never gonna find you fake it  
no no no  
  
Chill out whatcha yelling for?  
Lay back, it's all been done before  
And if you could only let it be  
You will see  
  
Somebody else round everyone else  
You're watching your back, like you can't relax  
You're trying to be cool, you look like a fool to me  
Tell me  
  
Why you have to go and make things so complicated?  
I see the way you're acting like you're somebody else gets me frustrated  
Life's like this you  
and You fall and you crawl and you break  
and you take what you get and you turn it into   
honesty  
promise me I'm never gonna find you fake it  
no no   
  
Why you have to go and make things so complicated?  
I see the way you're acting like your somebody else gets me frustrated   
Life's like this you  
You fall and you crawl and you break   
and you take what you get and you turn it into honesty  
promise me I'm never gonna find you fake it  
no no no  
  
_  
  
Authors note - I really have no Idea how the laws works I just fit it to the story.  
Thank for reviewing. Review :) song - Avril Lavigne - Complicated.


	9. Chapter 9 Why can't I part 1

Chapter 9 - Why Can't I-Part 1  
  
( That same night )  
Here's a part of the story that I have told no one.  
Angel pinned me against the wall.  
Cordelia walked down the hall waking up from the commotion. She was a very light sleeper.  
She turned the corner to see me against the wall and Angel unbuttoning my blouse.  
She watched in fear. She didn't want to see this happen...again.  
Before Spike could arrive she ran off.  
  
I awoke with Spike's arms around me. I smiled. This was great, him holding me. His body against mine, it felt right.  
I felt him stir next to me.  
"Spike, you awake?" I asked.  
I felt him tense then answer. "Yes, Luv."  
I turned around to face him. He had a smile on his face, I was afraid he would kick me out the minute he woke up. He seemed glad I was there. H e leaned over and his lips touched mine for a brief instant.  
"Buffy, you have to leave before everyone wakes up." I nodded and sat up.  
He did the same, kissed me, then I left.  
I snuck into my room not waking Darla or Glory. I quickly laid in my bed, as soon as I closed my eyes I heard Glory wake up and turn on a light.  
"Buff, Darla time to wake up." I sat up and stretched as if I've been asleep for hours.  
"Already?" I groaned. Already? What else was I gonna say? _"Oh well you could have slept longer so I could sneak in a little later from Spike's bedroom"_  
I gathered up my clothes, a towel and went off to take a shower followed by Darla and Glory.  
  
In the shower I just thought about Spike, the way his body had fit perfectly against my own. The way his lips felt against mine. The way he looked at me with his blue eyes and the way he said "I love you."  
Life was good ,well minus the fact I was in prison. Well what else can you do?  
I finished up , turned off the shower, grabbed my towel and walked to my room with the white material wrapped around my body. As I walked down the hall I heard people talking. I turned my head around the corner to see Spike pinning Angel against a wall.  
"Look, Spike. I didn't do anything. She wanted it."  
Spike slammed Angel against the wall again but harder this time. "Bullshit! I heard her say "stop". Very clearly."  
Angel smirked. "Spike, they just need a little push."  
With that Spike punched Angel. "Sorry man. If I knew you actually care about the people in this place, I wouldn't have."  
Spike had his eyes closed his knuckles were turning white. He looked like he was about to explode. containing himself he pointed down the hall "Go." He simply said. Angel ran off.  
I smiled then started to walk off to my room when I dropped my clothes. "Shit" I muttered under my breath. Apparently it was too loud.  
"Who's there?" Spike asked. I poked my head around the corner and smiled meekly.  
"Buffy." He said with a sigh of relief.  
He walked over to me and wrapped his arms around me. "Are you feeling better." He asked as he rested his head on top pf mine.  
"I'm fine." I told him truthfully. He pulled away smiled, looked around then kissed me.  
I could so get used this, being with him, but I didn't like sneaking around. I don't think anyone here would be supportive, so I guess that was the only way.  
  
Me, Glory and Darla walked out to clean up and of course there was Cordelia. Hoping she would leave me alone today I grabbed a trash bag and started to get to work.  
After a while Cordelia came up behind me and whispered.  
"I can't keep secrets." That's it. Hasn't she learned her lesson, why couldn't she stop fucking with me? Throwing my trash bag on the ground I spun around to face her. I was about to say something but I stopped. The look in her eyes told me was wasn't screwing around. Sadness lingered in her eyes.  
"I can't keep secrets. Not anymore."  
I titled my head.  
"Cordelia what are you talking about?"  
  
After clean up she came to my room and She talked to me.  
"He doesn't stop, not until he gets what he wants."   
Angel.  
"He has rapped me and a few other girls but everyone is to scared to step forward. Well alone that is."  
She looked up to me for hope.  
"I saw you and Angel last night and I knew you weren't a willing participant. I think if we all step up together maybe we can finally get him out of here.  
"That's a good idea." I told her. I think our relationship wasn't as black and white as it seemed.  
"We'll come up with a plan." I told her, she nodded and I gave her a hug.  
  
After Cordy left. I looked up the clock. Faith should here soon. I took out a piece of paper and scribbled a note.  
  
I saw Faith an hour ago and I slipped the note in her hand.  
  
_Faith,  
  
I can't say these things aloud so that's why I wrote this.  
  
I had gotten in a fight with this girl she saw me and Spike kissing. I've told you bout Spike right?  
Well he pulled me away from her and took me to his room.  
We did some very fun things.  
Then last night I was almost rapped my some guy and Spike pulled him away. Again.  
The girl I had gotten in a fight with, just came up to me and told me that Angel the guy who almost raped me.) he has been raping a lot of girls. We are planning to get him firsed. Well enough about him.  
  
Spike, and I are together. Well I'm not sure If you would call it "together" He told me he loved me.  
And Faith...  
I love him too.  
  
Lots of love  
  
B_  
  
I was about to go to dinner but I went to check the bathroom to see if I left my panties there. I couldn't seem to find them.  
As I as walking Someone grabbed me and pulled me into a corner. I was scared it was Angel. It wasn't, it was Spike.  
He pulled me in and kissed me. I smiled and slowly reached into his pocket and felt a piece of material. I raised my eye brow as I waved the panties in front of him.  
"I took then from earlier." He told me kissing my neck.  
I stuffed them back into his pocket. He picked me up and carried me into his room. I could only imagine what would happened in their.  
  
_  
Get a load of me,  
Get a load of you,  
Walking down the street  
And I hardly know you  
It's just like we were meant to be  
  
Holding hands with you,  
When we're out at night,  
Got a girlfriend  
You say it isn't right,  
And I've got someone waiting too.  
  
The problem is, this is just the beginning  
We're already wet and we're gonna go swimming  
  
Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you  
Why can't I speak whenever I talk about you  
Its inevitable... it's a fact that we're gonna get down to it  
So tell me...  
Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you  
  
Isn't this the best part of breaking up  
Finding someone else you can't get enough of  
Someone who wants to be with you too  
  
Its an itch we know we are gonna scratch  
Gonna take a while for this egg to hatch  
But wouldn't it be beautiful?  
  
Here we go we're at the beginning  
we haven't fucked yet, but my head's spinning  
  
Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you  
Why can't I speak whenever I talk about you  
It's inevitable, it's a fact that we're gonna get down to it  
So tell me  
Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you  
  
High enough for you to make me wonder  
Where it's goin'  
High enough for you to pull me under  
Somethin's growin'  
Out of this that we can control  
Baby I am dyin'  
  
Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you  
Why can't I speak whenever talk about you  
  
whenever I think about you   
_  
  
Authors note - Song - Why Can't I -Liz Phair (Thanks Kerry)  
Review.


	10. Chapter 10 Why can't i part 2

Chapter 11 - Why Can't I - Part 2  
  
Spike carried me to his bedroom his lips never leaving mine.  
I ran my hands through his gorgeous hair.  
He laid me down on his bed, unbuttoning my shirt, as he did that I unbuckled his pants then I pulled his shirt over his head making his lips leave mine for that one moment. When his lips left mine I left like I was alone and I didn't like it, but after a minute he started on my lips again.  
He was there completely naked and I was still covered on the bottom and my bra was still on.  
I reached behind me and unsnapped my bra, while he worked on my jeans  
After we were both full naked his lips automatically latched on to one of my nipples. The sensation raced to my nether areas. My back arched, his mouth was incredible.  
"Spike." I moaned as he kissed down my stomach and to my pussy. He licked around my lips purposely avoiding my sensitive clit  
  
Spike was now thrusting in and out of me. I haven't felt like this since... never.  
I have now decided Spike was an ultimate sex god. I felt my climax building, My continued faster and harder. I dug my nails in his back as the tension increased.  
"Spike!" I screamed as I climaxed. Spike covered his mouth with mine as he spilled his seed inside my womb.  
  
My body was spooned against his. His arm was draped across my stomach as he kissed my shoulder blade and nibbled at my neck.  
A smile never leaving my face.  
"Buffy, you have to leave soon." He told me then his lips returned to my skin. I looked at the clock. I had missed dinner, Darla and Glory would be back soon wondering where I was.  
"I know." I said dreamingly. I didn't want to leave I wanted to lay here till the earth swallowed my up.  
"Don't want to." I said simply. He smiled and laughed as he held me tighter.  
Eventually I stood up and got dressed. Spike kissed me then I left for my room.  
When I arrived I laid down in my bed exhausted. Oh god that was the best sex I ever had my entire life.  
Why wasn't he married? That was when realization hit.  
Married.  
Could he be married? I had asked him why he lived here. He had said because he lived to far away.  
We had never talked about if he was married or had a girlfriend. My moment of relaxation had just turned to serious tension.  
Glory and Darla walked in.  
"Hey Buff, why weren't you at dinner?"  
"Not felling well." I simply told Glory. Well I guess I wasn't completely lying.  
  
Next morning I was in the courtyard with Cordelia an we were talking about Angel.  
"We could just go talk to some the girls and find out how who has been raped by Angel." I told her.  
"Yes, but wouldn't a few girls be to scared to step up."  
"We'll just have to do with what girls we can get."  
  
Needing to seriously talk to Spike, I went to Mrs.. Jones and asked for some supervision when I shave.  
I went into the bathroom, striped down and started the tub. After a few minutes there was a knock at the door.  
"Come in." I simply said.  
I was not expecting this.  
Angel.  
"What are you doing here?"  
He waved his eyebrows.  
"Supervising."  
  
Spike walked down to the front desk.  
"Hey Sarah" Spike referred to Mrs. Jones. "Do you know where Miss. Summers is?"  
  
I was shaving trying to cover myself from Angel with my hands. His eyes wouldn't leave my body.  
Suddenly the door flew open and thee was Spike.  
"Go!" He yelled to Angel.  
Angel obeyed and left.  
He closed the door and locked it. I was so relieved that Spike was here.  
  
He came up to me and hugged me.  
"Are you Ok?"  
I nodded. "Spike, I have to ask you something."  
"Yes." He said as he waited for me to continue.  
"Are you married or do you have a girlfriend?"  
He shook his head. "No. Of course not Buffy. I love you."  
I was so relieved I attacked his lips.  
A knock came to the door. Spike backed away. "Come in."  
Darla came in. "Faith is here."  
I nodded and she left. I kissed Spike one more time, got dressed then left to see Faith.  
  
Faith was shocked by my letter. She talked about how the holidays were coming up. We basically just chatted about our current life story.  
  
_  
Know all about, yeah 'bout your reputation  
And now it's bound to be a heartbreak situation  
But I can't help it if I'm helpless  
Everytime that I'm where you are.  
You walk in and my strength walks out the door  
Say my name and I can't fight it any more  
Oh I know, I should go  
But I need your touch just too damn much  
  
Lovin' you, yeah, isn't really something I should do  
Shouldn't wanna spend my time with you, yeah  
I should try to be strong  
But baby you're the right kind of wrong  
yeah baby you're the right kind of wrong  
  
Might be a mistake, A mistake I'm makin'  
But what you're givin' I am happy to be takin'  
'Cause no one's ever made me feel  
The way I feel when I'm in your arms  
They say you're somethin' I should do without  
They don't know what goes on when the lights go out  
There's no way to explain  
All the pleasure is worth all the pain  
  
Lovin' you, yeah isn't really something I should do  
Shouldn't wanna spend my time with you yeah  
I should try to be strong  
But baby you're the right kind of wrong  
yeah baby you're the right kind of wrong  
  
I should try to run but I just can't seem to  
'Cause every time I run you're the one I've run to  
Can't do without what you do to me,  
I don't care if I'm in too deep yeah hey-yeah  
  
Know all about, yeah 'bout your reputation  
And now it's bound to be a heartbreak situation  
But I can't help it if I'm helpless  
Everytime that I'm where you are,  
  
You walk in and my strength walks out the door  
Say my name and I can't fight it any more  
Oh I know, I should go  
But I need your touch just too damn much  
  
Hey-yeah  
  
Lovin' you, yeah, isn't really something I should do  
Shouldn't wanna spend my time with you yeah  
I should try to be strong (should try to be strong)  
But baby you're the right kind of wrong (right kind of wrong)  
Baby you're the right kind of wrong  
(Baby you're the right kind of wrong)  
Yeah baby you're the right kind of wrong  
  
_  
  
Authors note- review. I'm not that good at sex scenes but eventually they'll get better  
Song - Leanne Rimes - Right kind of wrong  
if you want emial updates email me at 


	11. Chapter 11 Let the games begin

What I like about you Chapter 11 - Let the games begin  
  
Me and Cordelia sat in my room going over a list of girls that said Angel raped them Their was only around nine but they hoped it would help get rid of him.  
"Ok." Cordelia said as she looked over the list. "We have... Tara, she killed her girlfriend for leaving her. Willow, she skinned some guy."  
"Yuck" I cringed at the thought of something like that. Who would do something like that? I mean being angry enough sure but actually skinning someone.  
Cordelia nodded then continued. "We have Piper she killed husband for leaving her pregnant. Anya, she robbed a bank. Tru, she stabbed a guy for stealing her soda." I raised an eyebrow. For stealing a coke! Damn. Cordelia nodded.  
"Amy, chopped mothers head off. Fred killed her professor for failing her because she wouldn't have sex with him. Harmony, held up a shoe store and last but not least Phoebe, attempted murder on boyfriend for trying to kill her sister. "  
I nodded as Cordelia ended. "Quite a group of fierce little warriors we have." I said sarcastically.  
"We're just going to have to do what we can." I nodded agreeing with her.  
"Let's just get them together and we can go to someone about Angel. We have enough girls to do some major damage."  
I nodded once again and looked over the list of girls one last time before shutting the notebook close.  
"Ok, tomorrow we can gather up the girls and talk about our plans."  
"Ok." Cordy said getting up and leaving. "See you tomorrow."  
"Bye." I yelled as Cordelia left the room.  
Cordelia and me have been meeting during lunch for the free time. We have spent a week trying to find girls you would confess that Angel had raped them.  
They gave the girls an hour for dinner and I only about spent about ten minutes with Cordelia a day.  
After I would spend my time with Spike. Spike and I have a relationship, it might not be completely normal but we both liked it. I slid the notebook with our plans under my bed. Cordelia and I diffidently didn't want anyone to find the notes especially Angel.  
I excitingly jumped off my bed with a hug smile on my face. I quickly but silently walked down the hall way to Spike's room. When I reached his room, the first thing I did was reach for the doorknob when the door flew open. There stood Spike, shirtless and a huge smile on his face.  
"What are you so happy about?" I asked perfectly knowing what he wanted.  
"What do you think?" He asked as he grabbed my arm and pulled me into the room. As soon as the door was closed Spike was all over me. He automatically went for me neck nipping and licking. I loved it when he did this; he always activated the perfect nerves doing this. He knew this would diffidently turn me on.  
A moan escaped my throat as he continued. I ran my hands up his arms and to his shoulders. He stopped. I let out whimper at the loss of contact. He smiled at that and looked at me pouting, he quickly attached my lips with his. I smiled at that and quickly adapted wrapping my arms around his neck. He ran his tongue across my bottom lip then entering my mouth. He ran his hand under my shirt encircling my waist with his hands. And caressing my hips and stomach. After a few minutes I took his hands and led them up to my cotton covered breasts. He caressed my sensitive chest as I ran my hand down his stomach and to the waistband of his jeans. I unsnapped his jeans and unzipped them pulling them down, when my hands wouldn't go down any farther I used my feet to pull them down all the way. He stepped out of them and kicked them away, his lips never leaving mine. Spike moved his hands from my waist and reached the hem of my shirt, he started tugging on it then he pulled it over my head. Our lips lost contact for a brief moment then as soon as the shirt was out of the way his lips were back on mine. My knees were going weak and everything became cloudy as he ran his hands wherever he could get them. Him completely naked, he never wears underwear. I was still in my bra and pants, well not for long anyways. He reached behind my back and unsnapped my bra, he gently hand his hands over my shoulders bring the material down with his hands. After a second my bra was landing on the floor by our feel. We were still by the door; I never understood why he couldn't wait till I was out of range from that door. He placed his hands on my shoulder turning mea round where he was now by the door and I was more towards the bed. He led me by my shoulders to the bed and laid me down. My hands on the base of his head and his arms were placed on the side of me keeping himself up. He stooped kissing me pulling his lips from mine. I caressed his chest as he looked at me in the eyes. His eyes were so blue; you just couldn't explain quite how beautiful he really was.  
"I love you." He told me his eyes never leaving mine.  
"I love you to." I said honestly as I ran my hands up the side of his face. He smiled and took my hand and kissed it in the palm. I grinned he was so adorable. He dipped his head down between my breasts and kissed me so lightly, it sent a chill up my spine. He kissed down my stomach, when he reached the waistband of my jeans he unbuttoned them and pulled them off. He smiled when he saw the black thong I had on. He slipped his finger into them and pulled them down my tanned legs and through them aside. He was about to bring his mouth to me when I stopped him.  
"No." He looked up confused. "We don't have enough time. I just want you to be inside me."  
"Let me do this and when I'm inside of you I'll just be very quick." I raise an eyebrow and shook my head.  
He caved and crawled up my body till we were face to face again.  
He kissed me again before positioning himself at my entrance. He nipped my neck as he pushed in.  
  
We laid in bed panting and trying to catch out breath. I pulled his blanket up around us. It was starting to get old out know. Christmas was soon and we haven't talked about it.  
I glanced at the clock.  
"Shit!" I exclaimed as he shot up searching for clothing. He saw the cock it was two minutes before everyone would be coming back from dinner.  
He smiled then fell back onto the mattress. "I don't want you to go." I stopped and turned to him. I leant down and kissed him, he grabbed the back of my head deepening the kiss. I pulled away knowing we would get caught up in the moment.  
  
I walked to my room when I got there I gathered up my clothes and walked to the showers.  
The shower room was absolutely empty. I walked into one of the stalls, taking off my clothes and putting them by the bench outside the stall. I turned on the faucet and let the water surround me. I loved the feel of the hot pelting drops hit my skin. Everything was great until I heard footsteps. I stopped and stood completely still listening for more. This was the one thing I hated about taking showers. At home I would always play the radio while I was in the shower because my imagination tends to run wild when everything is almost completely silent. I convinced myself it was just me and I continued washing my self. After a few seconds I heard more footsteps almost closer now. I ignored it thinking I was going loony.  
After a few minutes I heard it again. I'm a jumpy person as it is. I slowly took my hand and held the curtain preparing to pull it open. As soon as I got up the courage to do it I ripped it open.  
As soon as I did a bloody body fell into the shower colliding with me. I was in too much shock. The girl had been stabbed in the back and there was blood everywhere, her eyes were open looking right at me she had dark blond hair. It was... Tara.  
The shock quickly went away and I screamed as loud as I possible could.  
  
Authors note - Ok let me tell you what happened. I was writing the chapter right. And I was like "la la la la la" I was just going to have some sex and talking with Cordy but I need to fill up more room. So I thought "let the girl take a shower" so I did then I thought it would be cool if someone walked in. Like spike then ' I STILL KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER' popped into my head the part where she was in the shower then boom I thought ok cool lets let someone die.  
Ok now that you've heard my useless rambling please review. :)


	12. Chapter 12 Uh Oh !

Chapter 12 - Uh oh  
  
Spike laid in bed staring at the ceiling still naked from when I was there about 10 minutes ago.  
Suddenly he heard a high pitched scream. He automatically shot up pulling on his jeans and shirt in record time. A few people had came out of their rooms including Darla and Glory.  
Without looking at the people peeking out there door. Spike ran as fast as he could to the scream. He was followed by a few staff members also. He was the first one to reach the showers.  
When he saw the scene he froze. He couldn't believe what he was seeing.  
He saw a naked me sitting on the stall floor with my arms wrapped around my legs, I couldn't stop staring at the dead body in front of me. I was in much shock.  
"Buffy." he said quietly. I peeked up to see Spike I was so relieved, many employees were coming in behind him. Spike walked over to the bench next to my stall, grabbed my towel and walked over to me carefully. He stepped over the body and knelt down wrapping me in the towel and helping me up. I clung to him not caring who was in the room. Not many of the employees noticed due to the dead body laying in front of them.  
He held on to me as he helped me walk to the other side of the room. I couldn't believe what had happened, this just seemed to unreal.  
"Buffy. What happened Luv?" He asked me sitting me down. I shook my head trying to recall the memories. "Uh, I was taking a shower and I heard footsteps. I automatically thought it was just me. Then i opened the curtain and Tara's already dead body just fell in. After that I couldn't move."  
He nodded. "Do you know who it was?" He asked. he seemed extremely worried. "I have absolutely no idea. "I told him honestly.  
"Ok." He said holding me. Neither of us were worried we figured either everyone would be distracted by the body or they would just think that he was comforting me like anyone else would. He absently stroked my hair as he held me.  
  
After I told homicide everything that happened I sat in m room just trying every possible way to get the images of Tara out of my head. I figured I should mark her name off the list of girls but when I reached under my bed it was gone. Completely confused I jumped off my bed and knelt to the floor, I ran my hands under the bed and found nothing. Someone took my notebook. I have one word for you.  
Fuck.  
We were screwed if that got into the wrong hands. I didn't want to think about that at the moment. I need to get the list of girls back written down so we had a record.  
I took out another notebook and a pen. I sat Indian style on my bed and thought up the girls. I remembered there was nine, I quickly scribbled.  
  
_9 Girls _  
  
I remembered a few.  
  
_Fred  
Piper  
Willow  
Phoebe  
Amy  
and Obviously Tara. _  
Those were the only I could think of from the top of my head. I had to think a while but then I remembered the rest.  
  
_  
Anya  
Lindsey and  
Tru  
_  
Satisfied I shut the notebook.  
As soon as the notebook closed my door opened. I quickly slid the notebook under my bed. Darla and Glory walked in.  
Darla came over to my bed and sat down next to me.  
"How are you?" She asked with a sympathetic smile.  
"Better." I told her and gave her a smile, it was nice knowing she cared. Glory was sitting on her bed reading a magazine clearly not interested.  
  
Later that day when everyone had finally left me alone I walked my way to Spikes room. Everyone was at dinner and I told Cordelia that I wanted to be left alone today and she understood. During dinner was when Spike didn't have to patrol or do anything else. It worked out perfectly. Darla and Glory had came into the habit of bring me dinner every night and they said that they didn't mind.  
I walked to Spikes door and opened it. I found him laying on his bed shirtless sound asleep. I smiled he was so cute. You just wanted to give him a teddy bear and take a Polaroid.  
I quietly walked in there and stood in front of his bed looking down at him. I smiled then crawled into the bed next to him. I spooned my self up against him, pulled the covers over us both then just laid there thinking about... well everything.  
After a few minutes I felt him stir beside me. I wasn't facing him but I could feel him open his eyes. He wrapped his arms around me and held me tightly he smiled then nuzzled into the hair by my neck.  
"Hello Luv."   
"Well. Hello." I said turning around to face him. I kissed the tip of his nose then kissed him on the lips.  
He stood up groggily pulling me up with him. He started kissing me.  
"Why did you pull me up? We were already in bed?" I said smiling.  
"So I could do this." He said lightly pushing me onto the bed, I landed sprawled on the dark colored sheets. I usually like this but this time it was different. A sharp pain raced through my stomach. I placed my hand over the painful spot suddenly curling into a fetal position. He quickly came to my aid. "Buffy are you ok."  
Not knowing what happened I just told him "I'm fine."  
"It's probably because you haven't eaten." He teased me, that brought a smile to my face. "You are way to skinny." He continued.  
"Look who's talking." I said back a smile quickly returning to my face.  
  
I sat with Faith as I told her about what had happened. She was in shock.  
"Damn B. You life could be a soap opera." I laughed at that. After a few minutes of pondering I figured I should tell her.  
"Faith." She could tell I was really worried.  
"What is it B?" She asked with a scrunched eyebrow.  
"Uh." I figured I shouldn't pussyfoot around. "I'm late."


	13. Chapter 13 to be pregant or not to be p...

Chapter 13 - To be pregnant or not to be pregnant. That is the question  
  
I sat on my bed as I rummaged trough the basket Faith left me.  
I'm surprised no one went thought it checking for weapons and other things of that nature. I guess they have gotten used to Faith leaving things for me they didn't care anymore. I searched under the Herbal Essences shampoo and the Dove body wash. I found it. The home pregnancy test.  
I haven't said a word to Spike. I had a plan if I was pregnant and what I would say to everyone yet I hoped I wouldn't have to lie and it was all a big mistake. I opened it from the box, quickly reading the directions then slipping the wand in my pocket. Sliding the box under my bed, I ran quickly to the bathroom.  
  
3 minutes! 3 minutes! I have to wait three minutes! Oh ok, they'll tell you your fate but they're making you wait three minutes. 3 minutes and the truth would be told. I reread the instructions. Ok. If they is two lines then I'm pregnant. If it's one line then I'm not pregnant. That's simple enough. Right?  
two and a half minutes later.  
30 seconds then its time. I was now pacing around the room. I stared at my watch ok once the second hand gets to the 12 then I can check.  
It was now at the 10 and I was going insane. ok now at the 11. Finally 12. I've been hurrying this for so long and now I couldn't seem to look at it. I stood above the wand with my eyes closed. I bravely opened one eye and looked.  
2 lines. I'm pregnant. I'm pregnant with Spike's baby.  
I placed a hand over my stomach. I felt like my world was falling apart yet there was a thrill of excitement.  
  
I walked back to my room with a semi- smile on my face when I heard screams down the hall. I turned to see everyone surrounding a door about 10 feet down. Slowly walking to the scene. I shrugged by a few people till I saw it.  
Fred Burkle was dead. She lay in the middle of her doorway. When I saw Fred my hand went imminently to my mouth. My stomach turned and flipped. She had been stabbed in the face. Now another girl was going to be have to be marked from my list.  
"What's going on here." We all turned to see Officer Andrew walk in. He insisted everyone call him by his first name. He was blonde and extremely short, we all were convinced he was gay.  
He came in and when he saw Tara he was just as shocked.  
Not waiting to see what happened next I ran to Spikes room. I figured since everyone was distracted I had a chance to tell him  
I walked up to the door that separated me and the father of my baby. I lifted my fist to the door and knocked.  
It took a few seconds but I heard shuffling around the room then the door opened to reveal a half asleep Spike. his hair was a mess.  
"Buffy, Luv. What's the problem?"  
I stuttered but I got it out. "I...I... ne...need to te..tell you someth..thing." He moved out of the door way signaling for me to come in. I did and stood there playing with the hem of my skirt.  
"What do you need to tell me?"  
"I... I'm uh..." Spike could tell I have having problem telling him. He sat me down on his bed.  
I simply reached in my pocket and handed him the wand. His eyes widened. I didn't know what he was thinking but I would have sold my soul just to find out.  
He didn't talk for a while but when he did I was surprised.  
"We can get through this." He said looking at me . He finally bared a smile.  
"I figured I can tell everyone it happened before I came here. I doubt they can tell by a week or two. If they can I'll say it happened when angel raped me. Only you, me and Angel really know the truth and I doubt they will trust Angel. Cordelia only saw the first half and..." I realized I was rambling, but before I could stop Spike muffled my words with a smothering kiss.  
He looked me in the eyes. "Trust me, we will get through this."  
_  
I watch u while you're sleeping  
Messy hair,  
chest bare,  
moonlight on your skin  
I wanna breathe u in  
In the silence, words come easy  
I can tell u now just how simple it's been 2 let u in  
Don't move, this mood is a painting  
We'll never find the same thing  
Love, do not make a sound  
Melt into me now  
2 become 1  
Love is so close 2 hurting  
With a shake we could wake  
from our own dreaming  
But we must make a vow  
'Cause I have waited a lifetime  
Now is the right time  
Love, let's make time stand still  
Let this moment last until  
2 become 1  
Like a bird owns its wings  
Like a song belongs  
2 melody  
U belong 2 me  
I fold your arms around me  
Let your flesh,  
your breath,  
your love,  
surround me  
Oh, u feel like home _  
  
Authors note- Sorry about the short chappy. Please Review.  
song by Jewle


	14. CHapter 14

Chapter 14 - Dead Red  
  
I walked down from my room to Spike's, I was surprised he took the fact of me being pregnant so well. Most men I knew would dumb me or leave me. Spike was one of a kind.  
This had became a normal routine me coming to his room during dinner, we both knew it was like a date.  
Walking up to the so familiar door, I knocked. He answered with a smile on his face.  
"Well hello there." He said wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling me into the room, I reached behind me and shut the door. He smashed his lips to mine and his tongue entered my mouth slowly and gently massaging my tongue with his. I moaned in this mouth, my knees threatening to give out. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he ran his hands under my shirt pulling it up with him. We broke the kiss for a second to get the material over my head. I started to pull his shirt over his head as he unbuttoned my pants. He reached behind my back unsnapping my white bra and it fell to the floor with our shirts. I pulled my pants down my legs steeping out of them and kicking them away. He did the same leaving him naked and me in my thong. He quickly fixed problem.  
He led me to the bed and laid me down gently he always made this part slow and sensual. He climbed on top of me supporting himself with his arms as he kissed me. He climbed own my body till he reached my chest, he quickly licked around my breasts before continuing down my stomach. When he reached my belly button he dipping is tongue in and rubbed my belly. "Hello, baby." he cooed. I smiled at that.  
He was so sweet.  
I pulled him up and smashed my lips to his. That was the cutest thing I ever saw him do.  
I used all my strength to turn us over, I was now on top and in control.  
I lifted my self a little with my knees and positioned himself at my entrance. I slowly lowered my self till he was completely in me. We both moaned at the contact. I rested my hands on the middle of his chest for leverage as I became pumping up and down on him. He felt as if he was in deeper this position.  
I looked at him underneath me. His eyes were closed and he was moaning. I loved the control.  
I started moving faster he started moaning faster and more frequently. After a few minutes a felt him stiffen before he came. He held back his groan. He looked up to me and smiled then grabbed the back of my head smashing his lips to mine. H rolled me over where he was on top with a growl. H attacked my neck, nipping and licking. He licked down my stomach and to the curls that covered my sex.  
  
We lay there panting and trying to catch out breath. I had to go in about ten minutes and I really didn't want to leave him.  
I saw spooned against him and his arm was laying over my waist rubbing little circles on my stomach where the baby lived.  
"I love you, Buffy." He told me as he kissed my throat.  
I turned over to face him. I cupped his face in my hands and placed a small kiss on his lips. "I love you too."  
"So what do you think these murders are from?"  
I rested against him. "I think Angel fond my notebook and he's just killing them off one by one. First I thought Tara was just a warning but, he's not stopping. We've warned all he girl and they protecting themselves. I hope."  
  
I sat in my room reading a magazine as Darla and Glory came in. Darla had a plate in her hand, she handed it to me and I thanked her.  
I started eating the "food," until a scream ripped through the air. I set the plate down and ran out the door.  
A brown headed girl ran out of her room. Officer Angel ran up to her asking what happened.  
"I came back from... dinner and Willow was in the middle of the room dead. She's bleeding everywhere." The girl sobbed.  
I ran fast everyone an into the room Willow had stabbed in the chest.  
  
I hated watching everyone around me die and the fact is it was my fault I left the notebook under the bed easy to anyone's reach.  
I really just wanted to forget the whole thing but I knew I couldn't just let drop. Angel needed to get what he deserved.  
I started at the ceiling n my room, it was pitch black but I just couldn't sleep. I heard the door to the room open and I automatically panicked thinking it was Angel, before I could do anything a hand was placed on my mouth.. He grabbed my arm forcing me to stand. I now knew exactly who it was. I could feel him a mile away. He pulled me out the door.  
Spike.  
He led me to his room without a word. When we finally got inside the room he spoke. "I missed you." He said lovingly before mashing his lips to mine.  
  
_  
Hold on to me, love  
You know I can't stay long  
All I wanted to say was I love you  
And I'm not afraid  
Can you hear me  
Can you feel me in your arms  
  
Holding my last breath  
Safe inside myself  
Are all my thoughts of you  
Sweet ruptured light  
It ends here tonight  
  
I'll miss the winter  
A world of fragile things  
Look for me in the white forest  
Hiding in a hollow tree (come find me)  
I know you hear me  
I can taste it in your tears  
  
Holding my last breath  
Safe inside myself  
Are all my thoughts of you  
Sweet ruptured light  
It ends here tonight  
  
Closing your eyes to disappear  
You pray your dreams will leave you her  
But still you wake and know the truth  
No one's there  
  
Say goodnight  
Don't be afraid  
Calling me, calling me  
As you fade to black  
  
Holding my last breath  
Safe inside myself  
Are all my thoughts of you  
Sweet ruptured light  
It ends here tonight  
  
Holding my last breath  
Safe inside myself  
Are all my thoughts of you  
Sweet ruptured light  
It ends here tonight  
_Authors note- song by evanescence- my last breath. GREAT SONG and Great LYRICS. Please Please review


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15 - Life???  
  
It's been a week and only two have been killed. Amy and Lindsey. No one in the place had any suspects but everyone was scared. I knew it was Angel but they still had no way to prove it. My relationship with Spike was doing great and we were in love with each other.  
I hadn't told anyone about the baby and I didn't know what they would do if they found out. Would they take it away? Make me have an abortion? I had been meaning to ask Spike but every time his lips touched mine I would melt away and forget.  
I desperately wanted to tell _someone _that would understand but I didn't know anyone who had been pregnant.  
I sat in my room running over my options. I figured I could hold off telling people until I started to show.  
Thinking back to the first few days I was here I remember someone who had been pregnant.  
Darla. She mentioned that she had been pregnant hence killing her boyfriend. Then was when I decided to tell Darla but only her not Glory, not Cordelia, they didn't even like me that much anyways.  
I decided I would tell Darla after dinner when Glory took her shower.  
Yep that's what I was going to do.  
I got off my bed and headed outside where I would work outside with the girls.  
Walking down the hall I passed Spike. God he was so cute today. Like everyday. If only I could skip the wor... no I can't, must be strong.  
He smiled.  
Oh fuck it! When he walked by I looked around and saw no one. I grabbed the back of his head and kissed him.  
I pulled away. He grabbed my hand and pulled me to his room. once I shut the door he was all over me.   
"Shouldn't you be working right now?" He asked kissing my neck.  
I nodded but didn't say a word.  
He stopped and i opened my eyes at the lost of contact. I pouted.  
"You stopped." i stated the obvious.  
"You have to go." He said with a pout of his own. He ran his hands up my side and kissed me once more.  
"Why?" I asked confused. Did he want me to go. Was he getting tired of me?  
"Because they'll come looking for you if you're late and you know it."  
I shrugged and looked down at his crouch. There was obvious proof that he wanted exactly what I wanted.  
"You sure?" I asked grabbing hthe bulge in his pants. He moaned  
"No. no we can't." I pouted again. He smiled, I knew he loved my pouts.  
"You really have to go." I wasn't going to fight him on this.  
"Fine." I said leaving. "Have fun in the shower."  
He smiled then headed off to do just that.  
  
I walked outside to see the other girls working. Glory came up to me.  
"Buffy, why are you late?"  
I shrugged really not knowing what to say. "I ran into some... unfinished business."  
"Oh, we thought you became the killers next victim." Se said holding up a stick as a weapon. I jumped a little but laughed.  
"And you all came looking for me. So touched.," I said bringing my hand to my heart. they laughed and continued on what they were doing.  
  
I was walking to the bathroom for a shower when i heard a high pitched scream down the hall.  
Not thinking I ran to the sound, turning corners and passing many doors till I found it.  
A girl with light brown hair sitting in her room. I was the first to get there. "What happened? I asked."  
She turned to face me. Phoebe.  
"Are you happy!" She yelled I was taken aback. "If it wasn't for you none of us would be in this situation! There wouldn't be so many dead and the killer wouldn't be after us. Since you arrived here you have been nothing but trouble. You should have left things alone. In this place if you see something you aren't supposed to see you turn your head. Everything was going fine till you fucked everything up!" Tears were flowing from both our eyes.  
"What happened!" Some one said running into the room. It was Spike and Officer Andrew.   
Phoebe spoke up. "I was coming in and I was attacked from behind. I wasn't able to catch or see him but i was able to get his mask." She said holding up a black piece of material.  
  
Everyone had examined the mask and no one figured out who is belonged to. I was still thinking about what Phoebe had said.  
I was walking to Spike's room to tell him what she had said and I also wanted to talk to him about the baby. When I arrived I was confused the door was opened. I peeked in to see him kissing Cordelia on his bed.  
I didn't want to see this. I brought my hands to my head. No NO No this could not be happening, not now.  
Not after everything. A sharp pain raced through my heart and my stomach. My stomach clenched. Oh god. I clutched my stomach and walked down the hall till I reached the bathroom. I buried my head into the toilet spilling the contents of my stomach.  
After a few minutes I just sat there how could he do this? I touch my stomach a living person was there and I had no way to help either of us out. It's daddy wasn't apart of this anymore. I couldn't handle it! I couldn't sit there and let my life go to shreds. I wouldn't let him. I won't let him take my life. If anyone's going to take my life. It'll be me. That was when I decided to do what I never thought I would ever do to myself. I got up and walked to my room like a lifeless zombie but I was quite the opposite I was full of life and just not mine.  
I walked into my room and I walked straight to the closet. and reached to the top shelf. I remembered Glory kept this here for emergencies and I was glad she did. A razor.  
My hand made contact with the metal. I hadn't realized Darla was there, sitting in her bed.  
"Buffy what are you doing?" She asked me but I ignored her. I made my way to the bathroom with the razor in hand.  
  
Once in the bathroom I sat in the tub figuring this would be the last place someone would look for me. My hand was shaking but I took the razor in my right and held up my left wrist. I touched the metal to my skin before jerking it to form a clean line of blood. the blood starting to spill causing my eyes to become heavier and I finally fell into unconsciousness.  
  
Spike walked into the bathroom he thought he had seen me walk in about five minutes before. He walked in to see the blood pilling from my wrist and the razor in my hand.  
  
_  
  
Perfect by nature  
Icons of self-indulgence  
Just what we all need  
More lies about a world that  
Never was and never will be  
Have you no shame, don't you see me  
You know you've got everybody fooled  
  
Look, here she comes now  
Bow down and stare in wonder  
Oh, how we love you  
No flaws when you're pretending  
But now I know she  
Never was and never will be  
You don't know how you've betrayed me  
And somehow you've got everybody fooled  
  
Without the mask where will you hide  
Can't find yourself lost in your lie  
  
I know the truth now  
I know who you are  
And I don't love you anymore  
  
It never was and never will be  
You don't know how you've betrayed me  
And somehow you've got everybody fooled  
  
It never was and never will be  
You're not real and you can't save me  
Somehow now you're everybody's fool  
_  
Authors note- sorry for the lack of updates. Been working on my new story. Once upon a time.  
Please review I really want to know what you guys think - Song Evanescence / Everybody's fool.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16 - Everywhere  
  
My eyes were heavy and I felt so weak. I hurt all over. Where was I?  
Then I remembered what happened before I passed out. Cutting myself,  
which I never thought I'd ever do. Then Spike. Spike and Cordelia.  
Spike and Cordelia kissing on his bed. That bastard. I was sure I  
would have died.  
  
Who could have helped me? I opened my eyes to be faced with Spike. I   
didn't say anything not knowing that I even wanted to look at that  
man.  
"You're awake." He stated the obvious. "I'll get the doctor." He said  
leaving. He didn't seem too happy with me but I didn't care. He could  
rot in hell for what he did.  
  
He came back with a doctor and a few nurses. The check various  
machines and I just laid there not saying a word. After about 10  
minutes they left him and me alone. I was in the hospital that part  
was obvious but he jus sat there and looked at me.  
  
"You know how hard it was to try to convince everyone it was an  
accident." He said to me not realizing straight away that I was ignoring him. I think he noticed part way through but he continued anyways.  
  
"I told them that I thought maybe you fell and hit you're wrist on  
the sharp mirror, since it has no frame. They didn't by my theory but  
they said they thought that the murderer was now trying to make them  
look like suicides." He stopped and looked over at me I as still just   
staring at him with no emotion what so ever on my face.  
  
"They believed that and they sent you here. Do you know what you had  
put me through?" He was now getting a little aggravated; he was   
holding his head in his hands.  
"How could you do that?" He asked but I knew he didn't expect an  
answer. He looked up to see me turn my head turn away from him. Now  
he realized I was pissed at him.  
"Buffy what's the matter?" He asked not knowing if he really wanted  
to know the answer that held the grudge he was not realizing was  
there.  
"Bastard." I mutter hoping it was loud enough for him to hear.  
  
"What?" He asked equally confused.  
  
"I saw you kissing Cordelia. You have me during dinner, her during  
break. You sure have it made don't you? All those girls right at your feet" I was facing away from him and I didn't know how I really wanted him to respond.  
  
"Buffy. It wasn't what it looked like. She kissed me."  
  
"Let me guess I missed the big brush off. Just like the movies. Huh?"  
I said sarcastically waiting to see what excuse he would come up with.  
  
"Well. Yes."  
"Whatever. I don't believe you." I said honestly. I was always told  
never to believe a lying man.  
  
"Buffy, let me tell you what happened."  
  
"I don't want to hear..." he interrupted me.  
  
"No talking. Just listen." He said and I obeyed shutting my mouth and  
letting him start the story that I wasn't sure was going to be  
fiction or non-fiction.  
He noticed I was going to let him continue so he did.  
  
"What you saw was Cordelia coming to me saying she thought she knew  
who was murdering everyone, since I have a reputation for being a bit  
nicer and open with the girls compared to some of the others she  
wanted to come to me with that information. She was sitting on a  
chair in my room and I was sitting on my bed. Before I knew it she  
started to kiss me. I pushed her off and told her that she could get  
in a lot of trouble for what she did and she realized her seduction  
didn't work. When she left I went looking for you, I saw you turn the   
corner for the bathroom. I figured I should give you some time alone  
but after a while and you hadn't come out I figured I should  
investigate and I did. I found you, wrapped a shirt someone left there  
around your wrist and made it look like an accident." He finished and  
he looked over I was now facing him.  
  
"You're not lying." I stated. I could see it in his eyes. He shook  
his head.  
  
"No, I'm not." He leant down and kissed me.  
He pulled away for a second. "Buffy. They know you're pregnant. They  
don't know it's mine though." I looked at him. Our big secret was  
revealed. Well as far as they knew MY big secret was revealed.  
"How?" I asked.  
He sat back down in the chair. "Well they check your blood and things  
to see if you had been drugged or anything like that and they found that you  
were pregnant and told them."  
I was afraid to ask my next question but I decided to spit it  
out. "What are they going to do with the baby?" Spike looked just as  
upset to give the specific information.  
  
"They..." He took a deep breath then continued. "After you have the baby they are making you give it up for adoption." Tears started to leak from my eyes. I tried to not break down but they were going to take away MY baby. The baby  
I had with the man I loved.  
  
- At the jail -  
Phoebe walked down the hallway to the bathroom when she heard Very  
light footsteps. She stopped and turned around to see an empty  
hallway.  
  
"Glory you can't do that." Darla protested following Glory into  
Phoebe and Piper's room. Glory was going to borrow a few things from   
Phoebe and Piper without their permission and they hated when people  
went through their things.  
  
"Glory, we'll get in trouble what if Officer Giles comes through."  
Glory rolled her eyes. "He's been assigned to watch Buffy at the  
hospital.   
They were now in the room the two sisters shared. Glory went over to  
the closet and opened it only to be faced with Phoebe dead hanging by  
the neck with blood dripping down her body. Glory stepped out of the  
closet her hand to her mouth.  
  
"What?" Darla said not seeing the body.  
She looked over to see the same sight; she let out a scream.  
  
I was walking down the hall of the hospital. I heard footsteps but  
when I turned around nothing was there. I turned back around and  
headed on my way. I saw a shadow looming over me but when I turned an  
axe was met with my head.  
  
I woke with a start. My heart pounding and I was sweating and  
panting. Glad it was a dream I looked over to see Spike sleeping in  
the chair next to me.  
I sat up and turned to him I touched his hand smiling. He was so  
beautiful and adorable when he slept.  
I was in love with him and the baby inside of me and I still couldn't  
believe they were taking my baby away.  
  
_  
  
Turn it inside out so I can see you  
The part of you that's driftin over me  
And when I wake you're, you're never there  
And when I sleep you're, you're everywhere  
You're everywhere  
  
Just tell me how I got this far  
Just tell me why you're here and who you are  
Cause everytime I look  
You're never there  
And everytime I sleep  
You're always there  
  
Cause you're everywhere to me  
And when I close my eyes  
It's you I see  
You're everything I know  
That makes me believe  
I'm not alone.....  
I'm not alone  
  
I recognized the way you make me feel  
I start to think that you might not be real  
I sense it now the water's getting deep  
I try to wash the pain away from me  
Away from me  
  
Cause you're everywhere to me  
And when I close my eyes  
It's you I see  
You're everything I know  
That makes me believe  
I'm not alone....  
I'm not alone  
  
Oohhhh......  
  
When I touch your hand  
It's then I understand  
The beauty lives within  
It's now that we begin  
You always light my way  
Whenever comes a day  
No matter where I go  
I always feel you soar  
  
Cause you're everywhere to me  
And when I close my eyes  
It's you I see  
You're everything I know  
That makes me believe  
I'm not alone...  
  
Cause you're everywhere to me  
And when I catch my breath  
It's you I breathe  
You're everything I know  
That makes me believe  
I'm not alone...  
  
And you're everyone I see,  
So tell me, do you see me...?  
  
_  
Authors note - I hope you like it so far. Please review I really want  
to know what you think.  
The song is by Michele Branch - Everywhere. A few lines in the songs  
give a hint about what'll happen for the two eventually. The song is  
also talking about both Spike and the killer.


	17. Chapter 17

What I like about you  
Chapter 17 - Secrets Revealed.  
  
I've been back from the hospital for a few days and the rumor of the  
baby has been buzzing through this entire place. Everyone knew and I couldn't  
go anywhere without getting stares and hearing empty whispers.  
Sitting in the cafeteria, a place I haven't been in a while an  
officer came up to me saying that I need to go to the managers  
office. Nodding I put my tray up and followed the female officer to  
the office. Once there she told me to sit down and she headed off to  
work.  
  
Sitting patiently a million thoughts raced through my mind. Could  
they know about Spike? What are they going to ask me? Am I in more  
trouble than I could have prevented?  
Sitting there looking at the floor I was called into the office. I sat  
down in the chair that was in front of her desk. Her name plate  
read. " Amelia Wiseman ".  
"Miss Summers. I'm going to ask you a few questions. I would like it  
if you answer them the best you can. Ok?" She asked with a faint   
smile. This woman was normally skinny with dark brown hair pulled   
into a tight bun. No make-up marred her face but she was beautiful.  
More than the average woman. Why she took a job in law was beyond me.  
She could have been a model at least.  
"Yes Ma'am." I said politely.  
"Ok." She looked on the paper that sat in front of her. "Who is the  
father of the baby?" She asked referring to the miraculas person  
living in my womb. "My old boyfriend..." I quickly searched for some   
name, I finally found the name of an old time friend. "Xander."  
She bought it then continued. "You know that after you have the baby  
you will have to give it up for adoption correct." That pained me. I  
wasn't even allowed to keep the baby that I was already falling in  
love with. Having to give it to some other family to raise and love.  
It'll probably never even know me. Never know the two parents who  
loved it more that anything. "Yes." I said in a weak voice. She  
noticed and looked up. "You want to keep the baby?" She sounded   
shocked that I would even want the baby. "I'm surprised usually girls  
want to do everything in their power to get rid of it much less keep  
it." She closed her eyes and thought for a minute. "If you can find a  
family member to take care of the baby until you are released then I  
think we can set that up." She said with a smile.  
  
I walked around the place thinking about what she had said. I knew  
no one who could take care of this baby, my family either were dead or  
cared less about me and Faith. Well Faith couldn't take care of  
herself much less a baby.  
  
I stopped when I heard voice from a room. I walked slowly over there  
and listened. It was about 4 officers talking about Phoebe's murder.  
They were saying how there was no way it was suicide the way she was  
positioned she need help from someone unless it was the murderer who  
wanted to make it look like a suicide like he did with me. I had  
heard enough and I knew this conversation was bound to get boring.  
Walking back to my room I passed Spike. He had a very sexy smirk  
showing and I knew what was on his  
mind. I grabbed his hand, looked around and pulled him to his room.  
After we were in his room he smashed his lips to mine. I pulled off my  
shirt while he tugged off his. Pulling down my pants I watched as he  
pulled of his. He never wore any underwear so this was always easier.  
This is the first time we've had sex since the hospital and the  
Cordelia incident.  
  
After a few seconds we were completely naked, touching and caressing.  
I took his hand and pulled him to the bed, I laid down and pulled him   
on top of me. I kissed him again, gabbing the back of his head. He  
quickly turned me over and pulled me to my knees. We never had been  
in this position and it was pretty new to me. He kissed my back  
before entering me slowly.  
This felt different. Diffidently good but different.  
  
I laid on top of Spike panting. We had switched position quite a few  
times and we were worn out. He drew lazy circles on my stomach with  
his fingers.   
"Buffy." He said. It sounded as if it were a serious conversation.  
"Yes?" I asked not sure if I wanted to know what was coming next.  
"I figured since they are going to give the baby up for adoption, I  
could adopt it."  
Oh my god!  
"What?"  
"Yeah, I figured I could say that me and my _wife _can't have  
babies so I want to adopt." A huge smile formed on my mouth. I turned  
around and kissed him. I smashed my lips to his in a bruising kiss.  
Out of nowhere a scream erupted through the air. We jumped and  
Spike ran to get on his pants. He looked so adorable running naked. He  
pulled on his pants and shirt "Stay here." He said before running  
out the door. Everyone was peeking through their door and a  
few were in the hallway. Hell I'm curious I slipped on a few pieces  
of clothing before stepping out the door. Not to my knowledge Darla  
saw me. No one looked twice seeing me come out of the room but Darla  
was confused.  
  
It turned out they found Tru in the shower with a slit throat.  
I was now in my room reading a book Spike had gotten me, it was about  
what to expect when pregnant.  
Darla came through the door.  
"Buffy?" I looked up from my book to face her.  
"Yes Darla?"  
"Are you fucking Giles?" She asked. I was surprised on how forward she  
was being. Talk about not beating around the bush. What should I say?  
Better play it safe.  
"What makes you think that?" I saw you coming out of his room."  
Damn!  
"Yes. But I'm not _fucking_ him. We are in a relationship."  
Darla didn't seem taken back or disappointed actually she was  
smiling. "Oh really!" She said with a huge smile. She leant down to  
hug me. She noticed I looked confused.  
"Well you said you weren't fucking but in a relationship. Now that's  
love." She thought for a second.  
"Is the baby his?" I nodded. "Sorry for all the hugging I'm a sucker  
for real love. It's a rare thing to find now a days." I nodded again  
then hugged her back . But to neither of our awareness Glory was coming  
in when I told all of this to Darla.


	18. Chapter 18

What I Like About You  
  
Chapter 18 - Things Change  
  
Glory stood outside the door to our room as she listened to what I was telling Darla about me and Spike. Right as I finished the conversation I was having with Darla and after she was done hugging me which was now the hundrenth time Glory walked in.  
"Hey girls." We both look up.  
"Hey glory." I said reaching to the foot of my bed grabbing the book I was reading only moments before.  
"So..." Glory started not even trying to hide the fact that she heard what we were saying before.  
"I hear you're screwing Giles." Darla and my eyes widened. "Where did you hear that?" I asked worried. How could she know these thing. Has it already traveled through this place?  
"Girls, you have to make sure no one is outside the door before you tell pricless secrets." She informed sitting down on her bed. She continued. "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone." A smile formed on my face at that. "Thank you." I said jumping off my bed and giving Glory a hug. Glory looked very uncomfortable.  
"Ok, enough hugging." She said pulling away. I was estatic. I now had a few friends that knew, which I could talk to instead of botteling everything up inside. It helped alot having people to turn to.  
  
Glory and Darla went off to work outside and I being pergnant and all, I didn't have to do as much work. So I automatically went to Spike's.  
Before I even knocked on the door it flew opened.  
"Well hello there speedy. Why are you in such a hurry?" I asked concerned.  
"I... uh have to go check on something." He said in a hurry. I wondered what was up his sleeve.  
"Ok." I simply said letting him pass.  
"Wait here for me?" He asked lightly cupping my face and kissing me gently. I nodded.  
I walked into his room and laid now on his bed as I waited. I hadn't gotten much sleep the night before and I was exhausted I just laid there thinking over the last few days and before I knew it my eyes difted shut and I slept.  
  
"Buffy... Buffy..." Spike said as I laid there. Eventually he woke me. When I saw him I smiled.  
"Hi." I said smiling even more.  
"Hey Luv." He said smiling back. "Nice nap?"  
"How long have I've been asleep?"  
"Only for about half an hour. We have an hour left."  
"Good." I said glad we had time to be with each other.  
I raised up a little to capture his lips with mine. "Yum." I said breaking the kiss. "I taste that good huh?" He asked smirking. I only nodded.  
He leant down and kissed me, I wrapped my arms around his neck pulling him closer to me.  
He climbed on top of me deepening the kiss.  
I reached down to the hem of his shirt and pulled it out of his pants pulling it over his head. Breaking our kiss for a moment we got his shirt off and my shirt off.  
After a few minutes we were completely naked on his bed.  
He licked and nipped my neck as I reached down to grab his ass.  
_See the stone set in your eyes _  
I quickely turned us around where is was on top, I lowered myself on him filling me with all of him.  
_See the thorn twist in your side I wait for you  
_  
I put my hands on his chest and start to move up and down pumping him in and out.  
_Sleight of hand and twist of fate On a bed of nails she makes me wait  
_Riding him I watched him below me obvioulsy enjoying the pleasure.  
_And I wait without you With or without you With or without you  
_  
I grabbed his hands bring them to my chest rubbing the rough palms against my nipples.  
_Through the storm we reach the shore. You give it all but I want more  
_  
After a while he reached down and rubbed my clit when he felt his climax approaching. "Buffy." He groaned.  
"Spike." I moaned as he continued his movements.  
_And I'm waiting for you With or without you With or without you I can't live with or without you  
_  
I felt my climax building and I countinued faster and harder.  
  
_And you give yourself away And you give yourself away And you give, and you give And you give yourself away  
_  
  
"Spike." I almost yelled as I came but he muffled it with his hand.  
  
_My hands are tied - my body bruised She's got me with nothing to win And nothing left to lose  
_  
  
I felt his body jerk as he spilled his seed inside of me.  
After we were spent I just laid on top of him we never bothered pulling him out of me and we just laid on each others embrace.  
  
_And you give yourself away And you give yourself away And you give, and you give And you give yourself away.With or without you With or without you I can't live with or without you  
_  
"I love you, Buffy."  
"I love you too, William."  
  
After I made it to my room they had found Piper Halliwell dead in her bed. (rhyme not intended).  
It looked like some one must have been suffercating her with the pillow laying beside her.  
I was on my way to see Faith and I despertally wanted to talk to her about what had happened.  
I walked into the closed in room to see Fiath.  
"Hey Buffy."  
"Where have you've been?" I asked wondereing why she hadn't visited the last few days.  
"I've been busy."  
"With what?" I asked concerened and curious.  
"Don't worry about it you'll find out soon enough."  
We talked for about half an hour about what had been going on. Lets just say Faith left shocked.  
  
Authors note-  
Hope you guys like it please reivew. This chapter is dedicated to - Angela, Gisme, Mary, Cutie, Karbear57, VamptasticA, EnglishChocolate, Jamie Lee, Kerry, Kit the Cat, Buffy Williams, Katie, Lost little Girl and Spike'slover.  
Please review. The song is by U2 - With or Without me. I recommend you download it and listen top it as you read


	19. Chapter 19 Officer Pyscho

What I Like About You  
  
Chapter 19 - Officer Psycho  
  
Three weeks have gone by and oddly no one else has been murdered. Everyone assumed that the killer had just stopped, but I knew better. They were just waiting for a chance to make another appearance. I knew it definitely wouldn't be long before they came out of the woodwork. The cops still had no suspects and they couldn't figure out how the girls were related to the other, but fortunately their search wasn't ending. I wasn't yet showing and the morning sickness sure wasn't making life easier.  
I swore I was definitely getting fatter but everyone just complimented me every chance they got,. Thathelped. I was only three months along so I had a while till Spike was able to adopt the baby. I was so happy that he was taking the baby instead of a faceless family that we will never know. Spike had gone to the library and looked up things about the baby, such as symptoms and how far along until the certain symptoms started to occur.  
  
I was sitting in my room with Darla and Glory while we chatted about useless and unmeaningful things. Things haven't been active around here at all. Boring, was the word most used around this place. Trust me, I would be at Spike's right now if he wasn't so busy. Lately he had been busy. We don't spend as much time together as we used to. I couldn't help wondering: Was he getting tired of me? Did he think  
I was now ugly? Or did he realize how much our lives would be changing and he's just trying to keep distance. Whatever it was, I wanted to know, but I didn't want to do anything until I knew for sure  
something was going on.  
"... so what do you think Buffy?" Darla asked turning to me. I had obviously missed a conversation which I probably should have been listening to.  
"What?" I asked confused.  
"Glory started to speak as she flipped through her book. "Daydreaming." She stated simply.  
"Yep." Darla agreed as she continued on with her current conversation. I smiled. I really did love those two. They were everything I never would be. They were like salt and sugar. Glory obviously the salt and Darla the sugar, she was the sweetest anyone could be in a place like this. Glory... well,. She made her problems the first priority but she wasn't bitchy about it either.  
A knock on the door interrupted my thoughts.  
I got up off my bed considering I was closer to the door. When I opened it, Anya appeared before me.  
"Hey Anya."   
"Hey Buffy." She said smiling, then continued on. "I heard you are pregnant and I know it can be hard finding clothes when you're carrying so I figured you could come over and have some of my over- sized clothes. I know you don't need them now but I figured the sooner the better."  
I nodded. "Thank you, that would be great." I said with a genuine smile.  
"Want to come now?"  
"Sure." I said before saying goodbye to Darla and Glory. I shut the door behind me before I started to follow Anya down the hallways.  
When they finally entered her room Anya walked over to her closet and pointed to a box. "There, you can look through that. You can take whatever you want."  
"Thank you." I said smiling before walking into the closet and leaning down to the box.  
The closet door closed behind me but I didn't think much of it. since I could still see perfectly fine. Anya had walked over to her bed to sit and read while I went through the box.  
Before I knew what was happening I started to hear voices on the other side of the door.  
"Who the hell are you?" I heard Anya ask,. but no answer came from the unidentified person.  
"Get away from me!" I heard Anya command.  
I slowly opened the closet door and I saw Anya still struggling with whoever the person was. but The back of the killers head was in front of me,. and he was wearing a black mask that covered his entire head. I turned back around into the closet looking for something that was possibly heavy enough to use as a weapon. I foundnothing that could be used,. until finally my eyes settled on a hard oak jewelry box. I lifted it and opened the closet door again. I came up behind the masked man and hit him hard in the back of the head. He  
fell to the ground and I dropped the jewelry box. I went up to Anya who was now on the floor to make sure she was all right but as soon as I turned around and turned my back to the murderer I felt a cold piece of metal come in contact with my throat. The jewelry box obviously wasn't hard enough.  
Damn!  
Then I suddenly knew it was him.  
He opened his mouth and words came out.  
That was when he was uncovered to the rest of the world.  
  
Andrew.  
  
Authors note - Thanks for the reviews. Dedicated to Buffy Williams,  
Angela, Fan, James Lee, James Gurl. And thanks to my New Beta Val


	20. Chapter 20 An Angel

Chapter 20 - An Angel

There I was; one slip and I lose everything.

My Life.

My Baby, and the man I was in love with.

One fucked up guy can take so much away with just a flick of the wrist. I then thought of... everything:

Meeting Faith that one sunny afternoon at college, which we both eventually dropped out of.

Meeting a man who ended up abusing me and when Faith put him in a coma.

Getting a wonderful job at a very nice restaurant.

The fateful day walking down the street to see Faith kill a man.

Being dragged away.

Meeting Spike who at first sight thought I was innocent.

Coming here and meeting Glory, Darla, Kendra and Cordelia.

Kendra killing herself

When I lunged at Cordelia after she saw Spike and I kissing.

Angel trying to rape me and then Spike rescuing me.

Cordelia coming to me with information that changed everything.

Losing the notebook that stayed underneath my bed.

Having sex with Spike for the first time.

People dying... a lot of people dying.

Faith giving me a pregnancy test.

Watching the pregnancy test form two lines instead of one.

Spike loving me.

Me loving him.

To go through all of this just to have it all taken away by this bastard. My stomach flopped and turned at the suspense of the moment.

As the situation had started to become known to everyone, the room started to fill with more and more people. I could tell it was making Andrew more nervous because his hand was shaking so hard I could feel the blade graze along the front of my neck. The moment Spike came in, his eyes widened. I instantly could tell he was going to end up blaming himself. Someone could burn to death in a factory explosion in China and Spike would find someway to blame himself. Our eyes connected for a brief moment and I saw anger and panic in his blue eyes. Andrew's mask had come off the minute he had fallen to the ground and he was now known to the world.

Everybody in the room was trying to convince Andrew to let me go. "Andrew, let go of Buffy." Cordelia encouraged. Spike however was still in a state of shock.

"No." He said firmly, I felt him pull me back a little. I tried to cooperate so the blade wouldn't feel so rough against my skin

"Why?" Spike choked out but no one noticed how much it was affecting him save me, Glory and Darla.

Andrew seemed taken back by this question, as if he thought everybody was already supposed to know the answer. "Why? Why? Because of her!" He said obviously referring to me. I felt the blade of the knife press further into my throat. "She was about to fuck up everything! She tried to lock up someone so beautiful as Angel! She has no right. As a monthly check I was ordered to look around the girls' room to look for weapons. I looked under her bed and found the notebook. It had a list of girl's she had as witnesses. She even had a plan about how they were going to lock up that beauty of a man. I had to get rid of anyone or anything that could put him away, even if it meant me." At those words Angel walked into the room.

"What the hell?" Angel asked as he took in the situation in front of him.

"They tried to lock you up." Andrew said hoping to win over the affection of Angel.

Angel sighed. "Andrew, I already told you. It was only one time and it was a mistake. We were both kind of drunk. I told you that it was a one-time deal. What are you trying to prove here?"

"That I love you more then these whores ever will."

"Andrew let go of Buffy." Angel said starting to come towards us. Andrew moved back as he approached.

"Andrew. I will never love you and I never will; this is pointless." Angel said angrily as he realized this was useless.

"Fine!" Andrew yelled. He brought his hand back up as he prepared to run the blade right across the front of my neck.

Right as he moved his hand, I knew that everything was gone. Love was now out of reach for Spike, the baby, and me. I was going to die and it really was my fault. My eyes locked with Spike's for a brief second. I was apologizing though my eyes and I hoped he got the message. Right before the blade moved I heard a gunshot. I opened my eyes to see Angel with a gun in his hand pointed at Andrew. Andrew started to fall back moving the blade with him. Before I knew what happened I was pulled into Spike's arms. He had pulled me safely away from what I thought was my fate.

The police took all statements from everyone who had witnessed the situation and they took Angel and Andrew away. Eventually, everyone started to leave me alone. They all felt sorry for me but when I told them that I needed to sleep, they all understood. The minute I felt the coast was clear I slipped my way into Spike's room. I found him laying there, just looking at me. I walked over to the bed where he lay and when slipped into bed with him he wrapped his arms protectively around me. I wasn't facing him but the door I had just come through. I could feel the back of my shirt becoming wet. Spike was crying.

"I almost lost you." He said with his hand over my stomach.

I felt my own tears start to build at the sound of his voice. I had to show him that he couldn't have prevented it and that it wasn't his fault. I turned around to face him. I kissed his neck, then his collarbone and drifted further down his bare stomach until I reached his pants. When I unzipped them, he looked up

"No. Not after what happened."

"I want to show you something." He lay back so I could continue. I pulled him free of his pants then quickly proceeded to pull off my own as well. He knew what I was about to tell him but I think he just needed to hear it. I pulled my panties off before sliding down on him until his hardness filled me completely. We both moaned at the contact.

"I was supposed to protect you," he told me as he lay there wallowing in his own guilt. I started the fiction as I moved up and down. I grabbed his hands and moved them to my face.

"I'm still here. We're still here." I said as moved his hands down to my stomach. "You didn't lose me. I'm not leaving you in any way, shape, or form. I love you and I'm still here; still with you and still on the earth." I moved his hands over my body to emphasize my point. "I'm not a ghost or an illusion. I'm with you till the day you die whether you like it or not." With that Spike let a smile slip. I then moved his hands to the sides of my face again. "You will never lose me. I swear to god you will never have to be in the situation we were in earlier. I promise."

I 

You're a song

Written by the hands of God

Don't get me wrong 'cause

This might sound to you a bit odd

But you own the place

Where all my thoughts go hiding

Right under your clothes

Is where I'll find them

Underneath your clothes

There's an endless story

There's the man I chose

There's my territory

And all the things, I deserve

For being such a good girl honey.

'Cause of you

I forgot the smart ways to lie

Because of you

I'm running out of reasons to cry

When the friends are gone

When the party's over

We will still belong to each other

Underneath your clothes

There's an endless story

There's the man I chose

There's my territory

And all the things I deserve

For being such a good girl honey

Underneath your clothes

There's an endless story

There's the man I chose

That's my territory

And all the things I deserve

For being such a good girl

For being such a hey,hey,hey,hey

I love you more than all that's on the planet

Movin' talkin' walkin' breathing,

You know it's true

Oh baby it's so funny

You almost don't believe it

As every voice is hanging from the silence

lamps are hanging from the ceiling,

Like a lady tied to her manners

I'm tied up to this feeling.

Underneath your clothes

There's an endless story

There's the man I chose

That's my territory

And all the things I deserve

For being such a good girl honey.

Underneath your clothes, Ah wha ho oh woah!

There's the man I chose

That's my territory

And all the things I deserve

For being such a good girl

For being such a good girl.

/i 

Authors note - Like it? Dedicated to Buffy Williams, Kaitlynn, James

Lee, Spike's Lover, VamptasitcA and Angela


	21. Chapter 21 Goodbye

What I Like About You

Chapter 21 - Goodbye

While everyone was working Spike and I sat in my room. I loved how I didn't have to work and Spike obviously liked it too. I haven't talked with Faith since before the incident and I still had no idea what she could have been up to. It didn't bother me at all, yet I am still curious.

Spike and I sat on my bed; with his hands tangled in my hair he was on top kissing. Fully clothed, he had one leg between mine with his other on the side. We were completely wrapped up in each other, our lips never leaving the others. Spike's hands were roaming all over my body and mine over his. Surprisingly a knock came to the door. Spike jumped off me so quickly we were both surprised about how fast he had moved. The door opened to reveal an unfamiliar staff member that I had never seen around before.

Spike tried to look stern he pointed his finger towards me, "...and never do it again."

I just mocked his tone, "Yes sir."

The lady started to talk to me. Since I had never seen her before, I didn't know her name.

"You're Buffy Summers, correct?" she asked as she looked down to the clipboard in her right hand.

"I'm here to tell you that you've been released." My eyes widened just as much as Spike's.

"What?" I asked completely confused.

"Someone named..." She took another look down at the clipboard then continued. "Faith Wilkins confessed to the murder so you're free." she said with a smile.

I honestly didn't know how to react to this. I mean yes something bad happened but something wonderful came out in return. Spike, our baby, and I were happy that Faith had taken the fall to help me out but where did that leave me? I had no apartment. Faith most likely sold before she confessed. I also won't be so close to Spike. I mean what if he finds someone else why I'm not here? What if we lose touch? I just really don't want anything like that to happen. I was in love with him and I didn't want to leave the comfort that had grown with this place.

"You're going to need to pack, you can leave today." The lady told me as she snapped me out of the thoughts with some of the big questions I really needed answered.

I just simply nodded, the lady left not realizing that Spike didn't leave with her. I had no emotion on my face as I just sat staring into space. He came to me and sat next to me on the bed. He gently and slowly brought his hand to my back while he tried to look into my eyes. I lifted my head and looked at him. Those blue eyes of his could melt away all your problems.

"You're fee, Luv. What's the matter?" he asked as he saw the fear, happiness, and confusion in my eyes.  
"I... I just don't know if I want to be." I said as I rested my head on his chest.

I sat on my bed with my suitcase on my lap. Glory was on the right of me and Spike on the left. Darla was sitting behind me has she hugged me.

"We are going to miss you." Darla said as she hugged me again.  
"I'll miss you guys too." I said, placing my hand over Darla's as she hugged me again.

"We'll definitely miss you, Buffy." Glory said with a smile that we rarely see on Glory.

The two left to leave Spike and me alone. After they went through the door. Spike turned to me.

"God, I love you so much." he said leaning his forehead against mine.

"I love you too." I said gently capturing his lips with mine. This kiss was slow, caressing and gentle.I hated it.

It was basically him saying 'goodbye'. He pulled away and pulled out a âslip of paper from his pocket. He had recently put his number on it.

"Here, this is my cell number. Call me tonight after you get back. OK?"

I nodded and took the paper from him. I licked my lips. I loved how he tasted like tobacco. Usually this disgusted me but with him it didn't taste so bad.

I was led down the hall by one of the cops. Before I knew what hit me I was passing Faith. She stopped.

"Faith." I said with a smile. We hugged then Faith handed me a pair of keys.

"What's this?" I asked confused. The key for the apartment, which is paid up for the next 6 months and the key to my car. "I gave her a hug.

"I got in for only 10 years." I smiled sympathetically.  
"I love you, Faith."  
"Love you too, B."

When I got home I dropped all my bags and looked around nothing was different. I quickly walked over to the phone and brought it to my ear till I heard a dial tone then I called Spike's cell phone.  
_"The person you are calling is busy at the moment. Please try again later." _  
After that I just sat on the couch

Authors note - Hope you Like it.


	22. Chapter 2223 Get a Job

Chapter 23

I woke up to another phone call. I groaned and leaned over to pick up the phone

"Hello, who's this?"

"Your baby's daddy" Spike said smiling

"Oh, Jeremy, I was wondering when you were going to call"

"Har de har har, very funny, luv" he replied

"I thought so," I said sitting up in bed. "I've missed you so much" I went on, pouting.

"Missed you too baby"

"I really missed that sexy body of yours," I told him flirtatiously.

"Read my mind. And those sexy comments are nothing?"

"They're just a bonus," I told him playfully.

"Well, I myself have been spending quality time with my shower" he informed me

"I know your pain baby, "I giggled.

"Ugh, all day I had to clean. Faith really should have hired someone.

"Speaking of Faith," I cut in "How is she?"

"Well... um" he hesitated

"Spit it out Spike," I ordered.

"Well, firstly, she and Darla are scratching each others eyes out, Glory keeps threatening to kill them both and she keeps hitting on me"

That pissed Buffy off "Go Darla," she said with mild enthusiasm "I hope she does scratch her eyes out.

"Yep, but don't worry, I'm all yours baby. Darla and Glory have been making sure of that," he told her with a laugh.

"And how is that?"

"It's weird. You'd think they were demons, the practically maul anyone who comes within 5 feet of me.

Buffy couldn't help the laugh that escaped "Well they are my girls."

"They sure are"

Spike paused for a brief moment. "What are you doing today?" he finally asked.

"Well" I started "I planned on looking for a job today. In a few, I'll get the paper and search for something"

"That's good"

"Yep, I hope I end up getting one soon. How did you end up becoming a policeman?" she questioned.

Spike thought for a second. "When I was younger, I started dating this girl named Dru. Well she was a basket case. A badass. The fear of every boy's mother. She took a fancy to me and she took me under her wing. She had so much control over me. I could be having sex with someone and she would just snap her fingers and I would run to her. We started breaking the law. Basically doing stupid things. We smoked pot, committed minor felonies. Well, one night we got very drunk, and we went driving..." Spike paused; taking a deep breath to settle his nerves before going on, I could tell this was getting emotional.

"Spike, you don't have to go on" I wanted to give him an opening to quit. To not say anything else but he didn't take it.

"When we were driving, a van came out in front of us. And I didn't hit the brake soon enough. There was a woman and her son in the car. The kid was only five years old and the mother almost died."

I could hear tears flowing from the other end and my own eyes started to water.

"She pulled through" he continued "but it hit me that because I decided to drink and drive I could have caused this little kid to grow up without a mother. My mother died only a few years ago and that was hard enough on me. Think about how that kid would have felt knowing his mother might have died because someone decided to take a little drive. That was enough for me to dump Dru and train as a police officer. For me, it's a road of redemption."

We both were silent. Until Spike was the one to break it

"I love you Buffy. More than anything"

"I know baby, I love you so much," I cooed soothingly to him. I think he just needed a comforting word after reliving that memory.

After I finished talking with Spike, I went to get a paper. After getting back I ended up circling three ads. One was a drafting job. My mom did that and she had taught me. I could work from home and make about two hundred dollars per draft. The second job was as a waitress, like at a restaurant I worked at before. The last was a teacher's aid. I figured that drafting would be a fine job for now.

I walked into the brick building with confidence; walking through the double doors. The first thing I saw were a lot of tiny little desks and people working away at their tasks. I walked up to the secretary and asked

"Where can I see the boss?"

I didn't really know what to call him, so I guess 'boss' would be a good enough term. The secretary pointed down the hall "Third door on the left"

I smiled and thanked her before heading down the hall. I came to a stop at the door and knocked.

"Come in" called the person from the other side of the door. I opened the door and there sat an older man in his 50's. "May I help you?" he asked turning to me.

"I um, I saw your ad in the paper and I wanted to see about the job."

He motioned for me to sit in the chair in front of him. I did and he started to talk about the position.

"Why do you want this job? I mean this specific job."

I thought for a minute before answering, "well, my mother before she died, she taught me how to draft, because she used to do it for a living. I liked how I could do it from home because I'm pregnant and I think it'd be easier on me and on you."

I hoped he's like the answer I provided.

"What's your name?" he asked, realising he hadn't yet asked me.

"Buffy Summers" I answered proudly.

"Well Buffy Summers, I like you. You've got the job. In a few days I'll send you your first project as an audition."

I smiled and shook his hand "Thank you so much" so happy that not only had I gotten a job, but that I could work from home.

A/N: I know, a short chapter and I'm sorry but... and yes there is a but, this chapter was a huge influence that is a while away. Darla


End file.
